


Redeem My Aching Heart

by madamelibrarian, Mrs_SimonTam_PHD



Series: Loving Heart [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels Nesting, Bunker Life, First Kiss, Fluff, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Nesting, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Season 11 Divergence, Traumatized!Lucifer, mentions of torture, trigger warning: self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-23 22:07:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6131644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madamelibrarian/pseuds/madamelibrarian, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs_SimonTam_PHD/pseuds/Mrs_SimonTam_PHD
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lucifer wakes up after being ejected from Castiel's vessel and back into his temporary one, now made for him. Realizing that the Winchesters, Castiel, and Gabriel aren't going to hurt him or kill him for the things he's done to them is a long arduous path that leads him on the road to redemption.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this, invited Mindy to shit post, and now you have a multi fic, 20.5K monstrosity XD

When God gave Lucifer a second chance, Lucifer woke up in Nick’s vessel, with Gabriel and Castiel peering at him. 

 

“He’s awake,” Castiel reported clinically. 

 

“Good observation, Cassie, tell me something I don’t already know,” Gabriel said dryly before reaching out to stroke Lucifer’s hair. The elder archangel recoiled from the touch, causing his brother to frown. 

 

“Luci? Luci, it’s okay,” Gabriel tried to soothe the skittish archangel, but the Devil wasn’t having any of it. He got out of the bed and began backing away from the two angels. He felt weaker, slightly more human in this vessel. He didn’t see the confusion in the baby blue eyes of Castiel, nor the worry in the amber eyes of Gabriel- all he saw was anger and hurt, and he was sure that they were going to hurt him.

Gabriel cautiously advanced and Lucifer turned to run, and run he did, until he smacked straight into Sam Winchester. 

 

_ Oh no. He’s going to hurt me.  _ He struggled in the now stronger man’s grip, whimpering. 

 

“Gabe?” Sam called, gently rubbing Lucifer’s back to try to calm him down, but Lucifer knew better. This was a torture method. Get him all nice and relaxed and trusting before unleashing unspeakable pain. 

 

“Oh, good, you have him.” 

 

Lucifer flinched and tried to get out of Sam’s grip. 

  
“Hey, hey, relax, shh, it’s okay,” Sam tried to soothe. 

 

Giant gold wings came into Lucifer’s line of vision and he screamed at the sight, whining. 

 

“Hey, hey, hey, what’s going on here?” 

 

_ Oh fuck, Dean Winchester’s here, he was going to wish he was dead, he was one of Alastair’s best pupils. . . _

 

“Lucifer. Look at me,” Dean said calmly

 

Lucifer hiccuped and turned to look at the elder Winchester and gave a whimper of fear. 

 

“Hey, what’s the matter?”  he asked, reaching out to stroke Lucifer’s cheek. The Devil shrank back from the Righteous Man and his touch. 

 

“What? You don’t wanna be touched?” 

  
“Please don’t hurt me,” Lucifer whispered. 

 

Dean gave a kind smile. “Oh, Lucifer, we’re not going to hurt you,” he said gently. 

 

Lucifer’s lower lip wobbled, unable to be certain of Dean’s intentions, shaking in Sam’s arms. He was cold, very cold. 

 

“Cas, go grab a blanket,” Dean said. “We got you, Lucifer, okay? Nothing bad is going to happen to you, alright?” 

 

Lucifer shook his head, not understanding. He was in a room with people who he had hurt or killed or tortured to insanity or any combination thereof, and they weren’t going to hurt him? That made no sense!

A thick, warm blanket was draped around his shoulders and Gabriel tucked him in close, trying to calm down the squirming Lucifer. “Hey, hey, Luci, it’s okay, we’re not going to hurt you, I promise,” he whispered. 

 

Tears rolled down Lucifer’s cheeks and Castiel gently wiped them away. “What did Father do?” he whispered. 

 

“I think God made him more human and less angel, so he’s feeling human emotions,” Sam whispered. “And he’s feeling like, since he hurt us, we’re going to hurt him.” 

 

Dean nodded. “Well, we’re just gonna have to show him that we’re not. God gave us a direct order.” 

 

Lucifer wasn’t hearing any of this, he was planning his escape. 

The excitement from everything caused him to faint. 

 

He woke up several hours later to a pitch black room, night having fallen while he was asleep. He let out a blood curling scream. 

 

Gabriel flew in, his golden wings blazing with light. “What’s the matter, Luci?” he asked in concern. 

 

Lucifer backed away, moving as far from Gabriel as possible, scared of the light and the shadows and his brother. 

 

Gabriel sat down on the opposite end of the bed. “Come here, Luci,” he coaxed. “I won’t harm you, I promise.” 

 

Lucifer shook his head stubbornly. 

 

“Come on,” Gabriel coaxed. “Come cuddle with me.” 

It took several minutes and Gabriel hiding his wings (after turning on a light) and lots of gentle coaxing before Lucifer finally made his hesitant journey to Gabriel, who hauled him into his lap. After some prompting, Lucifer buried his face into Gabriel’s shoulder, crying softly. 

 

“What’s the matter, Luci?” the golden angel asked. 

 

The fallen angel sniffled and shook his head, not saying. He didn’t want to say that he was afraid of the dark, afraid that he’d open his eyes again and be back in the Cage, being tortured again or that there was going to be demons there who hated him and were out for his blood. He didn’t want to admit that he expected Dean there with an archangel's blade, or Sam hyped up on demon blood to destroy him forever, waiting in the shadows for their revenge. 

 

He didn’t want to admit that he felt  _ human. _

 

“Okay, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Gabriel hummed. “Just stay right here, okay?” 

Lucifer hesitated, then nodded. 

Gabriel hummed a familiar tune as Lucifer clung to him and cried quietly. Never once did his younger brother mention that he was crying or anything. Just sat there, holding Lucifer, humming. 

Lucifer fell asleep clutching his brother tight. 

 

The next few days were hard on everyone. Lucifer wasn’t responding to anyone really. It took a lot of coaxing and a lot of gentle, soothing words that nothing bad was going to happen to him to even get him to allow soft, gentle touches. He woke up every night and screamed, but refused to tell whoever came to comfort him why he did so, or why he shook and tried to move as far away from the comforter as possible when they came in. 

It was Sam, surprisingly, who was able to pry the reason out of the skittish Devil one day, about a week after Lucifer opened his eyes.

“Lucifer. What’s wrong?” he asked, straight up and simple, his eyes going into the mournful puppy look. 

Lucifer burst into tears. “Why aren’t you guys hurting me? Why are you taking care of me? What did I do to deserve this?? I don’t deserve this!” 

Sam came over and wrapped his arms around Lucifer. The archangel struggled slightly, not sure what he did to warrant hugging and essentially snuggling, but he went with it, and he sobbed into Sam’s shirt.

“You deserve it because you don’t believe that we  _ do  _ care for you,” Sam said after a while, once Lucifer’s sobs died into sniffles and chokes of air. “You deserve it because you have thought, all this time, that the world was against you, that your family was against you. Because you went through eons of torture. Because, Lucifer, your family loves you.” 

“Then. . . then why? Why did they cast me out? Why did they betray me?” 

“Do you think they wanted to?” Sam asked gently. 

Lucifer thought about it and shrugged. “I dunno.” 

“I bet,” Sam hummed, shifting so Lucifer was situated on his lap more, “that when God made you Fall, He cried. That when Michael threw you into the Cage, he wanted to kill himself. That when Gabriel ran, it was because he couldn’t stand to see the two people he looked up to try to tear each other to shreds.” He held Lucifer close. “They felt like they had no choice, just like you felt like you had no choice.”

Lucifer sniffled and nodded. “Gabs,” he murmured, using the nickname he used for his brother when he was a fledgling. 

“You want Gabriel?” Sam clarified. 

“Gabs,” he nodded. 

Gabriel appeared and he made grabby hands for his brother. Sam and Gabriel shared indulgent, understanding smiles as Sam transferred the needy angel to the not so needy (at this moment) angel. 

“Hey there, Luci,” Gabriel said, chuckling as Lucifer buried his nose into his neck. “You doing okay?”

Lucifer shrugged and held onto his brother. Gabriel chuckled and kissed his temple. “You do you, okay?” 

Lucifer nodded and relaxed for the first time in his brother’s arms.  _ Gabriel won’t hurt me. Gabriel cares about me.  _ He didn’t dare to use the word “love” because he was pretty sure that the archangel holding him did not love him. He stabbed him and tried to kill him, for Father’s sake. No one would love him after that. 

Gabriel heard his brother’s thoughts and sighed quietly, giving a small shrug to Sam. He didn’t know how to tell or show his older brother that  _ despite  _ the attempted murder, he did love his brother. He really didn’t. 

Sam had no clue either, but he deemed that Gabriel had the situation under control and left. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer starts asking for forgiveness from Gabriel, Dean, Castiel and Sam

That night, Gabriel slept while holding his older brother close to him, like he would with a fledgling. And yet, Lucifer still woke up and screamed into the darkness that shrouded him with his worst thoughts. 

“Lulu?” Gabriel murmured as Lucifer slid out of bed and found the K-Bar in the top drawer, swinging at invisible foes. “HEY!” Gabriel leaped out of bed and grappled with his suddenly very strong older brother until he pried the K-Bar out of his hands and turned on a light, noticing how some color returned to his brother’s face and the shaking ceased some as Lucifer spun in circles to take in his surroundings, on alert for any threats. 

Gabriel put two and two together. “Luci?” he asked tentatively. 

Lucifer whirled around, his blue eyes wild and unseeing, and Gabriel melted. “Lulu, is the reason you scream at night because you’re afraid?” he asked gently. 

Lucifer’s eyes darted all over the room before giving a slow nod. 

“Afraid of what?” Gabriel coaxed. 

Lucifer shrank in on himself. “You’ll make fun of me.” he murmured. 

“I swear, I won’t,” Gabriel soothed. “You can tell me.” 

“Dark.” Lucifer whispered. 

Everything about nights clicked in place for the Messenger. The Morning Star always did dislike the night, saying that it was black and cold and unwelcoming (just like his Grace had become); but now, the dark held the monsters of Lucifer’s mind. No doubt that the images he saw were of himself, Cas, Sam, and Dean coming to take their revenge, or Michael. He also probably saw the torture he endured while in the Cage, the restless nights, everything. 

“Oh, Lulu,” he soothed. “Come here.” 

Lucifer was a little more willing to come to Gabriel, slumping tiredly into his arms. 

“What if we get you a nightlight, hmm?” Gabriel hummed. “Something that’ll remind you of the day? And you can turn it on and off when you feel comfortable, alright? We want to make sure you get the proper sleep, Luci.” 

“Don’t wanna sleep,” Lucifer whimpered. “Scary.” 

“I know it is, Luci,” his brother whispered. “But you’re a very brave angel, m’kay? Bravest angel I know.” 

“Angel no more,” the Devil whispered sadly, in resignation. 

The resignation in his older brother’s voice broke Gabriel’s heart, and he pressed a gentle kiss to his brother’s temple. “You’re an angel to me, Lu.” 

Lucifer shook his head slowly. “Fallen. Broken. Not wanted. Not worthy.” 

Gabriel frowned. “Why do you think you’re not worthy?” he asked quietly. 

“Hurt  _ everyone _ ,” Lucifer mumbled, burying his head so he couldn’t be seen by Gabriel. “I hurt  _ everyone. _ ” 

 

“You didn’t hurt me,” Gabriel tried. 

 

“Liar.” The Father of Sin growled. “You ran ‘way ‘cause of me, then I killed you.” 

 

Gabriel sighed and held his older brother close. He didn’t know what to say, so he kept silent. 

 

“Hurt Micha. Hurt you. Hurt Castiel. Hurt Sam. Hurt Dean. Hurt everyone.” He sniffled. 

 

“Do you still want to hurt them?” Gabriel murmured into his hair as he began running his hand over Lucifer’s shoulder in soothing circles. 

 

“Didn’t wanna hurt  _ anyone _ .” Lucifer whined. “But. . . bu’ I felt like I had to.” He cuddled into Gabriel. “Don’t like hurting people. Hurts  _ me. _ ” He pulled away slightly to rub his tears from his cheek. 

 

Gabriel helped him wipe away a stray tear that he missed with a loving smile. “The past is behind us. Father forgave you and so do I.”

 

“Why?” Lucifer asked curiously with a hiccup.

The youngest Archangel sighs as he rests his head on his brother’s shoulder. “Because, you’re my brother and if I can’t forgive you, how can I even begin to forgive myself for my part in all of this.”

“I killed you, though,” Lucifer said quietly. 

 

“It was just a flesh wound.” Gabriel tries to joke, making light of the situation. Because honestly if he thought about it too hard, he’d find himself in a melancholy that he’d need the entire stock of Baskin Robbins to pull out of. 

 

Lucifer shoved his brother. “Not funny.” He pouted. “I cried.” 

 

“Yea, but I got better.” he said with a chuckle as he rocked to the side from Lucifer pushing him. “Now, let me see the smile that lit up the heavens.” he says with a poke to Lucifer’s stomach. “And we’ll put all this behind us.”

 

Lucifer let out an indignant squeak and frowned moodily at his brother, covering his stomach. 

 

“Come on, Lulu. Don’t make me turn Sam’s hair pumpkin orange just to get a grin out of you.” 

 

Lucifer let loose a small giggle before covering his mouth, his eyes wide in shock.

 

Gabriel smiled in return and leaned in conspiratorially to whisper. “Or we could coat Cas’ wings in glitter like we did to Raphael and his garrison that one time.” 

 

Lucifer giggled and smiled, burrowing his face into Gabriel’s shoulder affectionately. He missed pranking his brothers with his Trickster.

Gabriel patted his knee and moved to stand up. “Come on. I have a craving for ice cream covered in every topping known to man and a few they haven’t thought of yet.”

 

Lucifer smiled shyly and stood up with his brother. “I’ve heard about something called a gummi bear. Can we try those?” 

 

Gabriel’s grin widens to the point of being nearly maniacal. “Lulu, you can try everything and anything you want.” Clapping his brother on the shoulder, he leads the former fallen angel to the kitchen where they make a glorious mess but enjoy every minute of it, even if Lucifer did get ahold of a lemon flavored gummi bear. The resulting face he made had Gabriel reeling in laughter as he conjured up further confections to try. 

The next person that Lucifer opened up so completely to was, again, surprisingly, Dean. But Sam figured out why when he noticed Lucifer and Dean curled up on the sofa, both of them wearing headphones, the faint sounds of a classic rock song coming through very loudly. Dean allowed Lucifer to recharge, to just relax and listen to music that he enjoyed. Since all Lucifer ever really did to Dean was pound him to near death in Stull Cemetery during the Apocalypse, Sam surmised that Lucifer felt like Dean would forgive him a bit more quickly, and Lucifer would be more accepting of it. Dean wasn’t a touchy-feely person by nature, which provided Lucifer with a certain comfort, knowing that he didn’t have to talk, that he could just sit there with Dean and listen to music, or watch TV (Dean got him hooked on “Dr. Sexy, M.D.”) and just enjoy each other’s company. When Lucifer was able to muster up his apology, Dean just rolled his eyes, admonished him for the chick flick moment, and ruffled his hair, making Lucifer smile. 

 

So there was Gabriel down, and Dean as well. That left him and Castiel. Sam wondered if he would be last, since he was Lucifer’s Vessel and not only that, but had been tortured extensively by Lucifer himself. But he also tortured as well as possessed Castiel. So it was really a coin toss on who Lucifer would have more trouble accepting forgiveness from. 

 

Castiel was the next for Lucifer to accept forgiveness from. The two started spending long hours in the garden outside, Lucifer caring for the flowers and the small vegetable garden while Castiel inspected the bees and their honey, and made sure that all was right. They often worked in silence, only speaking when Castiel needed help collecting honey, or when Lucifer was knee deep in dirt and needed a tool for this or that. The smiles they shared were those of hard work, determination and pride that their masterpiece was thriving. 

 

One day, they sat down on the small wooden bench that they had built together and talked quietly. Lucifer said his piece and looked away from the much younger angel. Castiel gently tilted his face back towards him and smiled, and talked with him gently, soothingly. They talked about the failures, the successes, and sharing one Vessel, and soon, they were making inappropriate jokes in Enochian about it, laughing like schoolchildren as they did so. For some reason, it was enough for Lucifer to bring his wings out, colored in the pinks that painted the dawning skies, but singed and burnt, feathers out of place. Both Castiel and Gabriel pounced on their brother and soon, the three angels were grooming and preening each other, babbling in Enochian. It became an everyday thing, and as Lucifer’s feathers returned to their pristine condition, the Devil himself relaxed. 

 

“He looks so much better once they’ve done the daily grooming,” Dean mentioned. 

 

Sam nodded as they watched, both sipping on bottles of beer. “Yeah. I just wish I could tell him that I forgive him.” 

 

“Still avoiding you?” 

 

“Like I’m one of the ten plagues.” 

 

“One of the what?” 

 

Sam threw his brother a bitch face. “You should try reading the book of Exodus someday. It’d be a nice change from Busty Asian Beauties.”

“That would require actual reading, Sam, which you know I don’t do.” Dean took a long pull of his beer. “Maybe you gotta approach him. Y’know, do the whole puppy dog routine. No one can resist that, except maybe a demon.”

 

Sam rolled his eyes and smirked. “Yeah, you don’t read. Which is why you totally don’t have a dog eared copy of  _ Slaughterhouse 5  _ on your bedside table.” 

 

“Shaddup, Vonnegut’s great,” Dean went to mess up Sam’s hair. 

Sam ducked from his brother’s hair seeking hand. 

 

“Yeah, and  _ Slaughterhouse 5  _ is required reading for some honors courses in high school,” he scoffed. 

 

“We’re not supposed to be talking about great works of literature,” Dean said loftily. “What we’re supposed to be talking about is how to get the pink winged Satan to understand that you don’t hold a grudge or anything against him.”

 

“Okay, if you want to read great literature,” Sam said, standing up a bit straighter, ready to get his geek on, “go read  _ Hamlet  _ or  _ Canterbury Tales  _ or  _ 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea  _ or, I dunno,  _ Gone with the Wind. _ ”

 

“Do I look like a nerdy librarian with a fetish for books older than Cas? No thank you, very much.” Dean scoffed as he took a pull from his beer. “Now stop worrying about the broadening of my mind and go talk to Pinky before Brain shows up with some crazy assed pastry for him to try.”

 

Sam rolled his eyes. “The oldest book mentioned was  _ Canterbury Tales  _ and I’m pretty sure Cas is older than Chaucer,” he said. “Go do things with your nerdy little angel, anyways, I’m going to go talk to Lucifer.” 

 

“Whatever, Bitch.” he mumbled as he resolutely stayed right where he was, drinking his beer.

 

Sam rolled his eyes and went to go approach the more relaxed angel, soft pink wings open, helping him balance as he looked over some rose bushes that weren’t there two months ago, when they took Lucifer in. 

 

Lucifer felt Sam behind him, and he tensed, but continued looking over his roses, stroking the petals. He felt his Grace returning and he put a small bit into the bush he was working on, helping him shape it. He pretended that the hunter wasn’t there, making his sole focus the bushes in front of him. He missed his rose garden up in Heaven, but he could recreate a smaller version of it down here, on Earth. 

 

Clearing his throat, Sam shoves his hands into his pockets as he surveys the new growth in the garden. “Looks like everything is thriving out here. I didn’t think the soil was rich enough to support the weeds, let alone roses.”

 

Lucifer smiled. “Between Castiel talking to the bees and my love for roses, we got a good thing going,” he said quietly, almost shyly as he moved over to his yellow rose bush, the white one shaped where he wanted it. “The soil’s fine, it’s just old. Needed to be revitalized.” He began shaping the yellow one, humming as he did so.

 

Sam nodded as he circled around, looking at the various plants they’d been tending. “Can I ask you something?” he asked tentatively as he watched Lucifer out of the corner of his eye. 

 

Lucifer froze slightly, but nodded. “Of course, Samuel,” he said softly. 

“Do you resent me, for sending you back to the Cage?” Sam reached out to gently turn a leaf as if examining it.

 

Lucifer shook his head. “No, you won. Fair and square. Plus, it’s nothing more than I deserved. So no, I don’t resent you.”

 

Sam looked up with a forlorn expression. “Then why have you been avoiding me? I mean, I get it. We’ve fought more than talked before now. But it seems that you’ve made amends with everyone except me.”

Lucifer bit his lower lip and looked away, suddenly becoming very interested in the rose bush he was shaping. “Because out of everyone, I deserve your forgiveness the least.”

 

Considering Lucifer’s statement for a moment, he nods. “Maybe. But you never know until you talk to me and at least try.”

 

Lucifer nodded and shrugged, still attending to his rose bushes. “Why talk about something that’s truly unforgivable?” he murmured to himself. 

 

“It’s better than the alternative.” Sam circled around until he was standing with the rose bush in between them. “Listen, we’ve all done things that we regret and think that people won’t forgive them for. But you know what I’ve learned? Nothing is unforgivable if you truly wanted to change.”

 

Lucifer grimaced. “Yeah, and sometimes, even if you want to change, people won’t forgive you,” he said. “Look, I understand if you don’t. I did some truly unspeakable things to you, both here on Earth and in the Cage. Really, I’m fine with it.” He kept his eyes away from Sam but on the bush, frowning as he began reshaping a rose. 

 

“Lucifer, listen. I won’t say that I whole heartedly forgive you for everything but you weren’t alone in that cage. Michael took his fair amount of shots at me and there was a time I remember where he was being particularly brutal and you stopped him. You kept me safe for a short time and for that I thank you.”

 

“Michael was about ready to  _ kill  _ you,” Lucifer protested. “I couldn’t let that happen. You’re my  _ Vessel _ , I knew I needed to keep you safe. It was  _ survival. _ And I nearly came close to killing you once you took down the wall Death put up.”

 

“I always wondered about that.” Sam gently kicks at a mound of dirt with the toe of his boot. “Was that really you singing Stairway to Heaven for three days straight or did I really go insane?”

 

“Guilty,” Lucifer admitted. “That. . . that was all me.” He hung his head in shame, moving onto the next bush, turning his back on Sam. He couldn’t allow Sam to see him. 

 

Sam lets out an audible sigh of relief followed by a dry chuckle. “Good to know that I wasn’t certifiable. Not really.” he walks up behind Lucifer and gently lays a hand on his shoulder where a wing wasn’t touching. “How about we try and start over?”

 

Lucifer froze at the touch and the words, shaking slightly. He couldn’t. He would always remember what he did, what he had made Sam do while possessing him, all the things he said to him and all of that. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t be able to start over. 

 

Clearing his throat, Sam removes his hand and holds it out for Lucifer to shake. “Hello, I’m Sam Winchester. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

 

Lucifer eyed his hand warily. Is this a joke? What was he supposed to do? He raised his eyes to look at Sam hesitantly. 

 

Sam looks down at his hand with a hint of a smile. “Cas always thought this was a strange custom too. But humor me.”

 

Lucifer looked at him. “What am I supposed to do?” he asked. 

 

“Shake my hand and introduce yourself like you’ve just met me. Think of it as symbolic of our new start.” Sam said with a wiggle of his fingers. 

Lucifer looked down at his dirt covered hands and hesitantly slipped his right one into Sam’s, shaking it lightly. “Hello, I’m Lucifer. . . Nice to meet you?” he said, unsure if he was doing it right.

 

Smiling wide, Sam claps his other hand over Lucifer’s figuring that the angel was a little lost. “You know, I’ve heard the best thing in the world after working in a garden all morning is a ice cold beer. Care to join me?” He nodded his head towards the spot where Dean still sat. 

 

Lucifer nodded. “Sure,” he said almost shyly, still a bit lost. 

 

Sam patted his hand once more and turned to head back, looking back briefly to make sure Lucifer was following. Lucifer was, and he looked away from Sam when he noticed the other’s eyes were on him. Reaching their destination, Sam reaches in the cooler and passed a beer to Lucifer before flopping down on the ground. He’d resolved on the walk over that he’d let Lucifer open up further in his own time. So the youngest Winchester sat quietly, sipping at his beer. 

  
Lucifer wiped his hands on his jeans and accepted the beer with a quiet smile before taking a drink from it, letting the alcohol hit his throat. He sat a bit closer to Dean but relaxed, trying to think and sort through his feelings and what Sam had said to him. He smiled a little and closed his eyes, basking in the warm su


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Lucifer have a heart to heart

Dean watched the two of them hedge around each other and rolled his eyes. “Oh for crying out loud.” he said in a voice that cracked the quiet. “Would you two stop dancing around like two...idgits and talk to each other?”

 

Lucifer blinked at Dean. “Depends, will you finally nut up and bang my baby brother?” he asked bluntly.

 

“Who says I haven’t?” Dean grumbled as Sam nearly choked on his beer. 

“Said baby brother, and I’m an archangel, you daft chimpanzee. I know these things.” Lucifer raised a brow. 

 

Dean rolls his gaze towards Lucifer, looking unamused at the jibe. “You have no idea how creepy it is that you can tell who I do and do not ‘bang’.”

“It comes in handy though.” Sam quips around the mouth of his beer. “In case you bring home any mysterious rashes.”

 

Lucifer gestured at himself. “Hello, Dean, I’m Lucifer, I’m the Devil and the Father of Sin, I am the epitome of creepy.” He chuckled at Sam’s comment. “No, Dean here hasn’t brought home any women- or men- since I told him that he needs to pin little Cassie to the bed and drill him into the mattress.” 

 

“Whoa..hold up.” Sam sputters as he sits down his beer to glare at his brother. “Since when do you like guys, Dean? And how in hell could you not have told me?”

 

Dean sighs as he pulls another beer from the cooler. “Thanks, Lucifer. Just what I needed this afternoon. A brother having a coronary.”

 

“Oh, calm your tits,” Lucifer rolled his eyes. “Sam’s not having a coronary. Honestly I don’t know how Sam  _ didn’t  _ know, the sexual tension between the two of you is reaching the proportions of Mount Vesuvius before it exploded onto Pompeii.” 

 

Sam’s indignation slowly melts into a shit eating grin as he nudges Lucifer with his arm. “It would explain the staring contests they engaged in for the past 6 years. Pure eye sex.”

 

Dean huffed as he stands and points at the pair of them. “You two can just….go suck a tailpipe. What I do or do not do with Cas is my own business. And as for you, Samantha. I don’t want any of your chick-flicky talks about the bravery of coming out or anything else your girly brain thinks up.” Turning on his heel, he storms off for the Bunker, making sure to slam the door as hard as he could. 

 

Lucifer laughed and relaxed on the porch grinning. “That was fun.” 

“You realize he’s going to get you back for that. I’d watch your shampoo from now on.” Sam says with a chuckle as he glances back at the door. 

 

“I just got to use my Grace to wash up that's all” Lucifer laughed. “Problem solved.” 

 

“Well just don’t let him start a prank war that will escalate to permanent bodily injury.” Sam grinned as he retrieved his beer and finished it off.

Lucifer chuckled. “Roger that. I’ll make sure to stop it before then- you forget I grew up with a bona fide Trickster. I know how to stop a prank war.” He finished his own beer and stood up. “Few more rose bushes to shape and then I should be done with them for that for a month or so,” he hummed. 

Sam watched him stand and gave him a sad smile. “I meant it, Lucifer. I’m willing to work at forgiving you if you can do the same for me. Start fresh.”

He blinked at Sam and clapped a hand on his shoulder, looking down at him. “Easy for you to say, you really didn’t do anything unforgivable towards me,” he said quietly. “I can’t forget what I did to you, Sam. Fresh starts with old wounds sound. . . dangerous.” He sighed. “I will do my best, though.” 

“That’s all I ask.” Sam stands and brushes the dust from his pants. “Don’t take too long with the roses. I heard Gabriel mentioning something to Cas about introducing him to food the proper way. Whatever that means.”

Lucifer raised his eyes to the sky in mock prayer for help. “Oh Father help us.” he said. “Alright, thank you for the heads up.” He turned and went over to his roses again to think and tend to them. 

 

Sighing, Sam heads into the bunker just in time to hear Dean yell at the top of his lungs. “WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE TO MY KITCHEN YOU SUGAR SATURATED DICK?!!” Sam turns his eyes towards the ceiling. “Lucifer’s right, Chuck. Protect us from your crazy, trickster son.”

 

Over the next few days, Lucifer made a considerable effort to not avoid Sam, but he also didn’t really seek him out actively, either. He still had trouble looking Sam in the eyes, but he was at least looking in his general direction. He still listened to music with Dean and tended his garden with Castiel and pranked Gabriel, but with Sam he felt awkward and was trying to just not fuck up again. And every night, he felt like he failed and would cry himself to sleep quietly. 

 

One night Sam was walking to his room on his way from the library when he passed Lucifer’s room. Seeing the door ajar, which was strange for the angel to do, he takes hold of the knob to slide it shut when he heard soft sobs coming from inside. His brow furrowing in confusion, he peeks through the door to see Lucifer curled around his pillow with his wings wrapped around him tight like a cocoon. Something in Sam breaks at the sight and honestly he’d become fed up with Lucifer avoiding looking at him and Gabriel shooting him dirty looks like it was Sam’s fault that Lucifer was still wary of him. Slipping inside the room, he shuts the door and slowly approaches the bed. Bending down, he lightly touches Lucifer’s ankle to let him know someone was in the room. 

 

“Luce, you okay?” he asks softly. 

 

Lucifer jerked at the touch, not expecting it, and he nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he mumbled, subtly using his Grace to hide the fact that he’d been crying. 

 

Sam sits on the foot of the bed and turns so he can face the archangel. “You sound like Dean. It took going to hell and him suffering 40 years on Alistair’s rack for him to finally stop telling me ‘I’m fine’ when he cried. What will it take for you to do the same?”

 

“‘m not crying,” Lucifer grumbled petulantly, wrapping his wings a little tighter around him, as if the words physically pained him. 

 

“Right. And I’m giving Gabriel rimjobs on the sly. Now either you tell me why you were...not crying or I wake Gabriel and Cas up so they can find out.” Sam’s jaw is set in determination but the hardness of his expression is offset by the soft concern in his eyes. 

 

“Wouldn’t care if you were rimming my brother,” Lucifer said, poking his head out and staring at the breast pocket on Sam’s plaid flannel. “Just. . . I just feel like I’m not getting anywhere, alright? It’s. . . hard because I can see you, I see your soul, and it’s so good and pure, and I look at me and. . . and I’m tainted. I. . . I can’t just ‘start over’. Not when I still see everything I did to you when I close my eyes, that I wake up screaming because I can’t run away from the memories and I just. . . “ he fell silent, having felt like he said too much already and ducked his head back down behind his wings. 

 

“You can’t let it go.” he said quietly. “You know, when Ruby had me addicted to demon blood..I wasn’t sure what to do with the memories of what I’d done afterwards. It’s something that I’ll never get over. Not really.” he dropped his head into his hands as he stared at his shoes. “Even to this day I crave it from time to time. That power, the...confidence is seemed to give me. Like I was invincible. Hell, even the pleasure I got from watching the blood drain from them as I took it. But then I have to remember that the things I did for that fix aren’t worth repeating because the guilt was so heavy I felt I was going to drown.”

 

Lucifer poked his head out again. “How do you do it, then?” he asked quietly, barely heard. He blinked slowly and eventually unfurled himself from his cocoon to scoot closer to Sam.

 

“I know it’ll sound strange, but I pray to God to help me forgive myself and try to find something each day to look forward to. Whether it’s Dean cooking burgers or a good book or saving someone from the monsters in the world.” he looked over at Lucifer with eyes heavy with doubt and sadness. “And when that isn’t enough, I think of my family and how I want to be better for them.”

 

Lucifer tentatively laid his head on Sam’s thigh, closing his eyes. “You had good intentions,” he murmured. “I didn’t. I did what I did because I was selfish and bratty. That is all. And at some points, it was for survival. Besides, if I hadn’t told Azazel to go create my special children, the demon blood wouldn’t have existed. I would still be in the Cage and preparing to torture some other soul. Or something. I don’t know.” He sniffled and bit his lip to try to stop the flow of tears. “My family hated me, and I don’t blame them.”

 

Sam looked down in surprise at Lucifer laying his head on his leg. He raised his hand and hesitantly laid it against his hair. “Over the years I’ve learned a thing or two about your family. And present company and bunker-mates excluded, they’re all dicks. Narrow minded and unforgiving for a supposed race made by a merciful God.” Sam’s fingers began to gently scratch against Lucifer’s scalp as he talked. “You were young as immortal beings go and it shouldn’t have been a surprise that you had at least one tantrum in your life. It was wrong of your brothers to have expelled you for having an opinion that differed from their own. Just ask Dean how often Dad and I butted heads and he still wanted to keep me around whether I wanted it or not.”

 

“Father was the one who gave the order,” he murmured. “I don't know how Mickey got the order but he was the one who gave it. And I begged for him not to. Michael didn't care. And still doesn't. I lost everyone that day.” 

 

“But now you have Cas, Gabriel, Dean and you have me. A new family who are giving you the chance to be happy again. If you want.” Sam whispered. 

 

Lucifer nodded and wrapped a single wing around him. “I'm scared” he confessed. 

 

“Of what, exactly?” he leaned down so as to be able to look Lucifer in the eye.

 

“Fighting. Being abandoned again. You all coming to your senses and deciding that I'm not worthy of this.” He closed his eyes, feeling overwhelmed. 

 

“Lucifer, Families fight. It’s what they do. Look at Cas. He’s not related to Dean and I by blood and god knows the amount of times we’ve fought with each other with him running off half cocked with some crazed sense of making things better, but we’ve always fixed it and welcomed him back.” Sam moved his hand so that he could wrap his arm around to rest against Lucifer’s chest. “A very important man once told me that Family doesn’t end with blood. And believe it or not, that extends to you and Gabriel now. So when I tell you that we aren’t kicking you out on the streets, I want you to believe it. Even if we get in a screaming match about laundry, you’re stuck with us until we’re nothing but dust.”

Lucifer gave a half shrug. “Not used to having this. I’m on my own, always have been,” he said. “It’s overwhelming and I can’t think of what I did to deserve this. To deserve anything from any of you, but especially you.” He shook his head. “From Castiel and Gabriel I expect it, but not from Dean and especially not from you.”

 

Sighing, he shook his head. “To tell you the truth, I’m getting too old to hold grudges anymore. It’s tiring. Especially when it excludes me from having contact with anyone other than Dean. 33 years is long enough to be alone with only a brother with a Peter Pan complex.”

 

“I think you would be well entitled to hold a grudge against the being who psychologically tortured you and tortured your very soul for the better part of two and a half years,” Lucifer said dryly. 

 

“Would you feel better if I chained you in the dungeon and tortured you back?” he snapped. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Don’t answer that. I shouldn’t have said it. But what is it going to take for you to hear me? Really hear me and believe that I want to move past all that. I want to die knowing that I had the ability to forgive my one time tormentor. Look at where you are for fuck sakes. You’re cuddled up in my lap and I’m petting your hair. When was the last time you knew someone who held a grudge to do that?”

 

Lucifer winced when Sam snapped at him and relaxed as he continued speaking. Once he was done, he laid there, pondering his words. “Never,” he finally said. “Because no one has ever done that for me, grudge or no grudge. No one really ever held me and told me that I was okay, that I was. . . not a monster.” He sighed. “Michael may’ve done this with when I was a fledgling, but. . . I have no memory of those days, not anymore. Those are gone. My earliest memory is the day Michael threw me into the Cage. And if you want to do the thing I’m not supposed to answer, then I’d not object. You’d be well within your right. All of you would be, but you especially.” He sighed again and slowly tried to untangle himself from Sam, retreating into his wings again as he felt the tears well up in his eyes once more. 

 

Sam stretched out beside him and hugged him hard enough that Lucifer’s back pressed against the hunter’s chest. “Lucifer, Morningstar Lightbringer. Prince of Heaven and King of Hell. YOU are not a monster. You’ve done monstrous things but they don’t make you a monster.” Sam whispers into his ear as if he were talking to a child fresh from a nightmare

“Lucifer. Devil. Satan. Adversary,” Lucifer whispered back, his body subconsciously  relaxing in Sam’s arms. “Angel no more.” A tear trickled out but he made no move to stop it. 

 

“You may not be prayed to, but you’re still an angel.” Sam placed his hand over Lucifer’s heart, pressing his palm tight against him. “In here you know that. You just need to relearn how to feel it again.”

 

Lucifer gave a very soft sniffle as he blinked the tears out of his eyes but kept his face hidden. “If I’m not a monster,” he mumbled, “then why do I feel like it? If I’m meant to be forgiven, why don’t I believe it? Why is it I got a second chance to have all of this, when there’s much better things that my Father could’ve done, like bring the ‘good’ brother out of the Cage?” 

 

“Welcome to the human psyche.” Sam said as he continued to hold Lucifer. “As for why Chuck decided to let you out and not Michael, you’ll have to ask him. I don’t want to pretend to know what’s on God’s mind.”

 

Lucifer nodded and buried his face more into his pillow. Sam holding him comforted him, although he couldn’t fathom why. He decided not to ask any more questions and just laid there quietly, crying silently, trying not to disturb Sam. He didn’t want the moment or whatever this was ruined. 

When they fell into silence it gave Sam time to think, really think. And he found himself not feeling apprehensive or angry about Lucifer had done. Not anymore. All he felt now was a sad kind of pity for the angel. He’d gone through so much with his family and Sam could sympathize. In fact, it was kind of scary when he realized just how many parallels there were between Lucifer and himself. Dysfunctional family with an absentee father and a sense of anger and self doubt that boiled just below the surface. Closing his eyes, he pushed the unhelpful thoughts to the back of his mind and without being conscious of it, he began to hum. Low at first until he was singing the words to ‘Hey Jude’ very quietly.

 

Lucifer faintly heard the words to the Beatles song and he relaxed fully, letting his brain cloud over in the feeling of warmth and love and family for the first time in millennia. His eyes slid shut and soon he was asleep, breathing quietly. 

 

Sam heard Lucifer’s breathing even out into a deeper rhythm. Carefully as to not wake him, Sam unwinds himself from the sleeping angel. Covering him with a blanket, he creeps out of the room, shutting the door behind him with a laundry list of things to add to his prayers tonight.  


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer begins to forgive himself and then does something stupid. Dean helps him.

Lucifer reacted better around Sam and relaxed around him, even meeting his eyes on occasion. He took what Sam said to heart and started to slowly forgive himself for everything he had done, starting with the wrongs that were easiest to forgive himself for. 

 

One day, however, it became too much for him, and he panicked. He locked himself in the bathroom when none of the others were home, and summoned his own angel blade to him. Gritting his teeth between his lower lip, he began to carve into his skin, bluish Grace showing through. 

First to be carved into his flesh was his little brother’s name, the  _ Gabriel  _ shaky, but readable. Tears pin pricked his eyes but he ignored the pain, taking a short break before moving onto Castiel’s name. 

 

Dean came home from the store and made an immediate bee-line for the bathroom. He knew he should have stopped earlier but he didn’t want to give the ice cream a chance to melt. When he get’s to the bathroom, he’s stopped short by a locked door. Banging his fist against the door he shouts through. “Oh come on..don’t lock a communal bathroom. That’s just unsportsmanlike conduct. I don’t care what you ate, Sam.”

 

“It’s not Sam!” Lucifer called, swearing in Enochian. He hid his blade and the blood on the floor, tugging the sleeve of his shirt down to hide the marks he had made. “Sorry, Dean!”

 

“Luci?” Dean asked with confusion as he tries to open the door again. “Let me in, I’ve gotta piss like a racehorse here.”

 

Lucifer opened the door and gave what he hoped was a convincing smile at Dean. “Sorry,” he said contritely, moving out of the way and letting the older Winchester in. 

 

“Why the hell did you lock the door? You have a bedroom if you need alone time to take care of yourself.” he says in a rush as he hurries to the urinal. Sighing in relief as he makes it to his destination and taking care of business. 

 

“Do you know how disgusting that is, Winchester?” Lucifer bantered, resolving to dive right back in once Dean wasn’t looking. His atonement wasn’t done.

 

“Which part? Us sharing a bathroom or you rubbing one out?” he shoots one of those smartass big brother grins over his shoulder as he tucks himself away and flushes the urinal. “Because, like I told Sam when he was going through puberty. Masturbation is a normal, natural function that you shouldn’t be ashamed of.” 

 

“I am an angel and do not require masturbation.  We have a slightly more dignified way that is significantly less messy.” Lucifer rolled his eyes. 

 

“But I bet it isn’t nearly as gratifying or fun.” he teased as he scrubbed his hands clean in the sink. Grabbing a hand towel, he turns around with a grin that falls off his face like leaves from trees in the autumn as his eyes fall on the blood seeping through Lucifer’s sleeves. “Why are you bleeding?” he hurried over to Lucifer, taking hold of his hand and roughly pushing up the fabric to find the source of injury. 

 

Lucifer struggled in Dean's grip, hissing as the cotton of his shirt brushed over his wounds. “no reason I got it” he said mentally telling himself off for making Dean suspicious. 

 

Staring at the wound, he can barely make out the letters but he can tell that it was too orderly to be a random slip. Balling up the towel in his hand, he gently wipes away the blood. Breathing in sharply when Gabriel’s name is revealed in angry gashes across Lucifer’s arm. “What did you use?” he all but growls as he tugs Lucifer towards the sink. 

 

He had the feeling not to lie to Dean. “My angel blade.” he confessed. 

 

“Gabriel is going to have a fucking cow when he sees this.” Dean grumbles as he pulls out the first aid kit to clean the wound. “So when he and Cas hear me screaming this in my mind, what would you like me to tell them?”

 

Lucifer remained silent and shifted from side to side uncomfortably not meeting Dean's eyes. 

 

“Good answer.” Dean placed a pressure bandage on the wound and put Lucifer’s free hand on top of it. “So how about you tell me why you’re carving yourself up like a Thanksgiving turkey?” crossing his arms over his chest, he leaned against the counter waiting for Lucifer’s to explain. 

 

Lucifer didn’t answer for a couple of moments. “Atonement,” he finally said quietly, holding his arm close, still making sure he didn’t meet Dean’s eyes, feeling remarkably like a chastised child.

 

Sighing, Dean doesn’t say anything, just stares at Lucifer for the longest moment. In a way he knew where Lucifer was coming from. There were many times over the years where he’d wanted to do something drastic but had always figured that in the end it’d be giving the demons and monsters the satisfaction of knowing that Dean Winchester couldn’t hack it. With a quick glance towards the door checking to make sure the coast is clear, he steps into Lucifer’s personal space and pulls him into a hug that in the past he’d reserved for Castiel or Sam. “I’m sorry, Luce. So damned sorry.”

 

Lucifer blinked. “For what?” 

 

“I don’t know. It just felt like I needed to say it.” Dean said as he pulled away from him. “Do you want to talk about why you felt you needed to do this?”

 

Lucifer shook his head. “No,” he whispered quietly, not meeting Dean’s eyes. “Please don’t tell Gabriel and Castiel and Sam? Especially not Gabe and Sam?”

 

“Alright, but on one condition. You talk to someone about this. I don’t care which one of us. Just don’t hold it in until you feel you have to cut it out again.” Dean gripped his shoulder, giving it a squeeze in an effort to convey that he wasn’t alone.

 

“Why?” he asked, looking at him. 

 

“Because, it’s not healthy. And that’s saying something coming from a functional alcoholic.” Dean gave him a wry smile. “Also, if Cas or Gabriel read my mind it won’t be my fault they found out. Got it?”

 

Lucifer nodded and sighed, deciding now it was as good of a time as any. “I panicked, felt like I wasn’t ever going to be forgiven, by myself or anyone,” he admitted to the hunter. “And. . . well, this is what I used to do in the Cage, in my true form. And I thought that it’d help while I was in a Vessel as well, and maybe it would be even better.” He cocked his head to the side. “Does that make any sense?”

 

“Kinda. Pain has a way of focusing the mind on the moment instead of the past or future. But it’s not a long term solution and it has a way of escalating into something you can’t control.” Memories of darker times when he was in the pit try to encroach on his mind. Squeezing his eyes shut, he fights against the wave of gut wrenching fear that still comes with them. He tries to cover his rising anxiety by scratching at the back of his neck. “How about you come help put the groceries away and then we go watch some Dr. Sexy and see if we can get our minds off our screwy lives for a while?”

 

Lucifer nodded. “Okay,” he said quietly. “Thanks, Dean.” 

 

“You’re welcome, buddy.” clapping him on the shoulder, he grabbed the towel on the way out and throws it in the laundry hamper. “I got you some of that popcorn you said you liked. I say we totally spoil our dinner and have some while we watch TV.”

 

He smiled and nodded. “Sounds good.” 

 

“Awesome.” he holds the door open for them to leave, throwing a smirk towards Lucifer. “Now let’s get out of here before someone comes by and starts thinking we’re hanging out in the bathroom for entirely different reasons.”

 

“Gross, you hairless ape” Lucifer teased as he headed out feeling better. 

After night fell however he couldn't help but feel incredibly disgusted by what he did and cried quietly to himself when he thought everyone was asleep. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel and Castiel cheer Lucifer up

Gabriel laid awake in his room staring at the ceiling. The itching sensation of his name being written with blood crawled over him like ants. Leaving him restless and worried. Unable to take it any longer, he threw back his covers and pad into Lucifer’s room. “Lulu?” he whispers. “You awake?”

 

“Yuh huh, Gabs,” Lucifer whispered back, silently cursing himself again, forgetting how strong blood and names were interlinked. “Why?” 

 

“I’m worried.” Gabriel crawled onto the bed and laid down facing his brother, his wings twitching spasmodically. “Someone’s been using my name in blood magic and I can’t stop the itch. It’s driving me nuts. You felt anything?”

 

Lucifer bit his lip and looked away before showing his brother his arm, caught and now feeling even more guilty.    
  


“Lucifer, what have you done to yourself?” he whispered in anguish at the sight of his brother’s arm. He gently ran a finger along the top of his name as he fought the urge to burst into tears.

 

“‘m sorry, I panicked and I did what helped me in the Cage and I was gonna go further, was gonna write Cas’ and Sam’s and Dean’s name as well, and then Dean came home and I couldn’t go anywhere else and I’m really sorry, please, please don’t leave,” he begged quietly, solving the tear problem for him as he began loudly sobbing. 

 

Gabriel wrapped him up in arms and wings as he clamps his hand around the wounded arm. He let his grace flow warm and soothing into his brother while Gabriel spoke words of comfort. “I’ve got you and I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving. I’m right here.”

 

Lucifer clung to his brother tightly, sobbing into his shoulder as he tried to let Gabriel soothe him. He kept apologizing, unsure of what else to do or say except  _ I’m sorry please forgive me  _ and  _ don’t leave me. _

 

Gabriel was at a loss. He’d never seen any of his brother’s so distraught but knew the more of them around would be better. So reaching out with his Grace, he roused Castiel and asked him to come to Lucifer’s room. A few minutes later, Castiel entered the room rubbing his eyes tiredly. “What’s wrong?” 

 

Gabriel looked up and motioned for his baby brother to join them on the bed. “Luci’s having a rough night.” 

Without further explanation, Castiel crawls up behind Lucifer and wraps his onyx wings around the archangels as he makes small chirps that would usually be reserved for fledglings. 

 

Lucifer shook his wings out, flattening them between him and his baby brother and felt himself calm down as he heard the equivalent of baby talk from Castiel. He replied in kind, his voice rough with tears and cracking occasionally. 

 

Even though the atmosphere was serious, Gabriel couldn’t help but giggle. “You guys are giving me flashbacks to our nest days. Just so you know, I’m so not going to be changing your diapers so don’t even think about it.”

 

Lucifer chuckled and closed his eyes. “I don’t remember our nest days,” he admitted sadly. “I don’t remember growing up or raising you or Cas or any of the other angels. Earliest thing I remember is. . . the day Michael threw me into the Cage after I created Lilith.” 

 

“Perhaps that is part of the problem.” Castiel offered from behind Lucifer. “You do not remember a joyful time. Only despair.” he peeked out from under his wing at Gabriel. “I don’t remember much myself, but Gabriel does. He could help us remember a simpler time.”

 

Lucifer smiled and nestled his face into Gabriel’s neck. “I’d like that,” he admitted softly.

 

Gabriel let out a snort as he raised his fingers to snap. “You want a throwback thursday then you’ll get one in full audio surround sound.” The echo from the following snap ricocheted off the walls. Turning the room from it’s drab dull gray colors to the bright hues of heaven. The first thing they heard was the sound of a high pitched giggle from a child. Castiel raised his head and looks around. A rare smile forming. “Lucifer, look. It’s Gabriel’s nest. We’re home.”

 

Lucifer looked up from his place nuzzling into Gabriel’s neck and let out a gasp as he saw a  _ much  _ younger version of himself chasing after a fledgling he knew to be Castiel with an adolescent Gabriel on his heels, giggling happily. “I’m home,” he whispered, happy tears now sliding down his face as he looked around. “I’m home.” 

 

“Ugh, I can’t believe I ever looked like that.” Gabriel groused as he sat up. “Just look at those wings..hardly any length to them at all.”

 

“Oh hush!” Lucifer laughed, hugging Gabriel close. “You were like, 12, okay? Good grief,  _ why  _ does my hair look like something reminiscent of a 90’s boy band?”

 

“Because Boybands were born of demon deals and demons got their inspiration from you.” Gabriel teased as he shoved Lucifer’s shoulder. 

  
“Both of you be silent.” Castiel chastised as he removed himself from the bed and followed after their younger selves. “I wish to know why Naomi found this information so damaging that she felt it wise to remove it.”

 

Lucifer felt himself bristle at the mention of Naomi’s name and uttered a vile Enochian curse describing exactly what he thought of Naomi. “Because it had me in it,” he said. “Y’know, the angel who fell from Grace because he rebelled? Many angels probably speculated that since I helped raise you that that’s where you got your rebellious streak from. So, remove the source of said rebellion.” He wiggled his way out of Gabriel’s hold and walked over, placing a warm hand on Castiel’s shoulder. “You were always rebellious, though,” he said. “I had nothing to do with that. That was all you.” He smiled as he watched his younger self catch the baby Castiel, the two of them laughing. 

“And don’t forget that Naomi was a militant dick. Always was.” Gabriel grumbles as he comes to stand with his brothers. He watches the scene and a large smile breaks out. “I remember this. This was the day that Castiel interrupted the choir with his off key squeeks. Zephera was pissed to say the least. She’d been trying to get that group to sing on key for weeks and in one afternoon, Cas set them back.”

 

Lucifer laughed. “She could never get the choir to sing on key whenever I wasn’t there,” he mentioned. “I mean, not to brag, but Father  _ did  _ name me the angel of music.” He smiled and watched the scene. “I miss Heaven,” he admitted. “I tried to visit a few days ago. That was a trip I won’t forget.”

 

Castiel and Gabriel looked at Lucifer in surprise. “Why didn’t you tell us?” Gabriel asked with a note of concern. 

 

“We certainly would have gone with you.” Castiel added as he sidesteps so he’s pressed shoulder to shoulder with his eldest brother. 

 

“Wanted to go alone,” Lucifer shrugged. “Wanted to go walking in my garden and tend to it and go into the library and read and just. . . see my home. Is that such a bad thing to want?”

 

Gabriel considers the reasoning behind Lucifer’s actions and shakes his head. “No, not at all. At least you still have a place left. Mine was converted into...I don’t even know what you’d call it. Storage I guess.”

 

“At least you both had a nest.” Castiel mumbles glumly. “Mine was destroyed.”

 

Lucifer wrapped his arms around his littlest brother and kissed the top of his head. “You’re allowed in my nest whenever, okay? Even if I can’t be there.”

 

Castiel mumbled a thanks as he hung his head. Gabriel looked between the two of them and claps his hands together loudly. “Alright, enough feeling sorry for ourselves. How about a little more flashback time?”

 

Lucifer chuckled and smiled at his brother. “Nice to have your sympathy,” he teased. “Flashback Friday this bitch, then.”

 

“You love my ability to redirect my attentions. Dean called it ADD, I call it multitasking.” Gabriel said as he looked around before snapping his fingers once more. “Oh father nooo…” he groans as the scene unfolds. “This’ll teach me to use my random setting.” In the distances a much younger Lucifer storms after a little golden ball of winged energy who is no bigger than a 4 year old and giggling madly as soap bubbles fly off of the child’s bare bum. 

 

Lucifer laughed loudly, buckling over in mirth. “Oh my Father, I remember this!”

 

“What am I seeing?” Castiel asked curiously as he tilted his head to the side. The small baby Gabriel stopping right in front of them to glance back over his shoulder. Seeing the younger Lucifer still after him, he squeals in delight and runs away again. “Gabriel, is that you?!” Castiel asked with widening eyes as he pointed at the child. 

 

“Yes, that is itty bitty Gabriel running away from his bath time, which he always hated,” Lucifer grinned. “And this was. . .ahhh, yes, the time we ran into Michael and with a look had Gabriel running towards the bath. He pouted the  _ rest  _ of the time and then ran away from bed time.”

“Thank goodness he grew out of that.” Castiel said with a smirk directed at Gabriel. “I don’t believe the Winchester’s would appreciate your streaking through the bunker.”

 

Gabriel chuckled as he watched a soaking wet memory Lucifer storm past them. “Nah, but I know a certain Winchester who wouldn’t mind you doing it.”

 

Castiel looked confused, so he turned to Lucifer for explanation. 

 

“He means Dean, Castiel, we’ve been over this,” Lucifer said patiently and smirking.

 

Castiel’s wings fluffed up in agitation as he averts his eyes from either of his brothers. “We are merely friends, with a profound bond. Nothing more.”

 

Lucifer laughed and shook his head. “Talk to Dean about that, I have a little birdie that says otherwise.”

 

“Is the birdie really a 6 foot tall moose?” Gabriel laughed along with Lucifer as Castiel glared daggers at them. 

 

Lucifer winked. “Not revealing any sources,” he said. When Castiel wasn’t looking, he mouthed  _ it’s Dean  _ at Gabriel and winked again. “Also, Sam’s six foot four, it’s Dean that’s only six foot.” He pointed at the room. “Another!”

 

Gabriel snapped up a new scene. This one has Lucifer strapping a helmet on a young Castiel’s head while he assures Gabriel that pushing Castiel off the cliff was the most effective way to teach him to fly. 

 

Lucifer buried his head in his hands. “Oh no. We all know how this went.”

“Should I be relieved that I don’t remember this?” Castiel asked as he watched the scene unfold with interest. 

 

“I’d say so. You broke a wing because you kept flapping them like a chicken, even after you landed.” Gabriel snorts as Lucifer from the past shoves Castiel off the cliff. The younger angel letting out an undignified scream as he careened over the edge.

 

Lucifer shrugged. “It’s the way I learned to fly. Except I wasn’t pushed off the cliff, no Michael  _ bodily threw  _ me off the cliff. And that’s how I taught you how to fly, Gabe.”

 

“My left dorsal wing still isn’t right, thank you very much. It still has a kink in the tip.” Gabriel gently shoved his brother. 

 

Lucifer laughed and shoved Gabriel back just as gently. “You learned, though, right?” 

 

“Only you gave me the right incentive. Have I ever thanked you for introducing me to taffy?” Gabriel said with a grin as he wrapped his arm around Lucifer's’ shoulders. 

 

“What’s taffy?” Castiel asked innocently. He’d heard of many foods from Dean but this particular one had never come up. 

 

“You’ve never introduced Castiel to  _ taffy _ ?!” Lucifer looked at Gabriel in disbelief. 

 

“I tried. He spit it out.” Gabriel held up his hands in mock surrender. “Granted, he didn’t have teeth at the time but it made an impression because he never wanted it after that.”

Lucifer face palmed. “THAT’s why, you nitwit.” He summoned a piece of saltwater taffy and handed it to Castiel. “This is taffy. It’s better than gummi bears.”

 

Castiel takes the sticky treat between two of his fingers and examines it. “Dean does say that I should try new things. Broaden my horizons, he calls it.”

 

Lucifer grinned. “It’s my favorite thing, next to roses and sunrises,” he admitted. 

 

“So help me if you say Whiskers on Kittens and blue satin sashes next, I’ll brain you.” Gabriel huffed as he turned to Cas. “Just eat it, Kid. Don’t analyze it.”

 

Castiel took a moment longer and pops the taffy in his mouth and starts to slowly chew. A few moves of his jaw later, he looks terrified at both of them, his wings flaring out in alarm. 

 

“Cas, calm down,” Lucifer soothed. “Just suck on it a little bit and relax. You have to have a relaxed jaw in order to eat taffy, alright? Just relax and in a couple moments, chew.” He snapped another piece of taffy in existence and bit into it, demonstrating. 

 

Gabriel could hardly contain his laughter as he watched the two of them. “I can’t..” he wheezed. “Suck on it, he says”

 

Castiel shot Gabriel a dirty look as he follows Lucifer’s instructions. A few minutes later, he’s able to swallow the candy with a lick of his lips. “It was good, but the consistency was a little..disturbing.”

 

Lucifer swallowed his own with ease, snapping his fingers and filling Gabriel’s mouth with taffy. “It is at first, but you get used to it,” he said idly. 

Glancing at Gabriel as the archangel furiously chews on his mouthful of candy, he grinned slyly at Lucifer. “You’ll have to teach me how to do that. It seems a most effective way to silence him when he’s being particularly annoying.”

 

Lucifer grinned wolfishly. “Oh, there’s  _ many  _ tricks that I can teach you, Castiel,” he said. “Especially to willing pupils.” 

 

Gabriel finally cleared his mouth and flicked Lucifer on the ear. “You’re it, ya dick.” and disappeared from the illusion to the real world and flying as fast as he could to Heaven. 

 

“OH NO YOU DON’T YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!” Lucifer laughed, flying after his brother. 

 

Castiel looked bewildered for a moment before following after his brothers. Bursting through the gates of Heaven, he could hear Gabriel’s laughter echoing as Castiel caught up to Lucifer. “Why is he fleeing?”

 

Lucifer looked at Castiel with a laugh. “He tagged me. So now I have to make him ‘it’ by touching him. It’s a game.” With that, he began running after Gabriel again, shouting in Enochian. 

 

Gabriel replied with a juvenile taunt as he tucked his wings tight and dove towards the ground. “Don’t let him touch you, Cas. Or you’ll be ‘it’.” Gabriel shouted out as he pulls up suddenly and raced past Castiel. 

 

Lucifer dove after his younger brother. “You know I haven’t really flown in like, millennia, right?” he called. 

 

“Maybe we should push you off a cliff so you can learn.” Gabriel called back. 

 

Castiel catches up to Lucifer once more to glide beside him. “Make me ‘it’. I will catch him for you.”

 

Lucifer grinned and flicked Cas’ ear. “You’re it. Go catch ‘im, baby bro.” 

 

With a grin of pride, Castiel spread his wings to their full span and with a beat or two he’d gained lengths on Gabriel. Getting so close that he could hear the rustle of the wind through Gabriel’s feathers. But Castiel wasn’t a Captain of a Garrison because of politics. He was excellent at strategy and the simplest one at the moment would be to let Gabriel think he’d not been captured. “Gabriel..” he called out in hopes the Archangel would slow so he could catch up.

 

Lucifer flew after Castiel, watching from behind. He smirked. “Atta boy, Cas,” he said to himself, flapping harder to act like he was still “it”. 

 

Gabriel glanced over his shoulder and slowed as Castiel had hoped. “Is he gaining, Cas?”

 

“No.” Castiel said as he came alongside Gabriel. Reaching out he flicked Gabriel’s ear. “But I have. You’re it.” he laughed before doing a barrel roll away. Gabriel gave an indignant squawk and pulled up short to a hover to watch the seraph fly away. 

 

“That sneaky little…” Gabriel huffed as Castiel leveled out and turned on a wingtip to change direction. 

 

Lucifer laughed and flew away from Gabriel, catching up with Castiel and patting his back. “Great job, little bro.” 

 

“Thank you.” Castiel smiled. “We should make it more interesting than flying in circles.” he scanned the horizon before pointing towards a copse of trees. “They seem widely spaced to allow us to pass through.”

 

Lucifer grinned. “My littlest brother is the devious one? Fair game. Let’s go.”

 

“It’s not deviancy only strategy.” Castiel explained as he folded his wings enough and dove towards the trees. 

 

When Gabriel saw where they were headed, he redoubled his efforts as he shouted after them. “Not in there. Do you want to be laid up with broken wings?!”

 

Lucifer laughed in delight as he heard Gabriel, doing his own wing fold up, going slightly higher than Castiel. 

 

Gabriel approached the treeline but at the last minute, got an idea. Landing on a low branch of the nearest tree, he crouched down. “If you guys want tricks.” he said to himself. “I’ll give you a trick.” Concentrating on the energy that gave this part of heaven it’s form, he tweaked it slightly with his grace until the trees began to shrink except for the one he was in. 

 

Lucifer noticed the trees shrinking and laughed. Landing on top of one of the trees, he found which one Gabriel was in. He flicked his Grace out enough to weaken the branch Gabriel was on before flying off again, skimming above the treetops.

 

Stunned by the change in his surroundings, Castiel flew up above the canopy and looked around for Lucifer. “This is what one would call devious.”

 

Lucifer grinned. “This is why we don’t play tag anymore,” he said. “It’ll just dissolve into what humans would call a homoerotic size display.” 

 

In the distance, Castiel and Lucifer hear the snapping of wood followed by a yelp. “What was that?!” Castiel asked as he turned and started to fly off into the direction of the sound.

 

“Our brother falling out of the tree he was in,” Lucifer mentioned with a laugh, flying off in the opposite direction. “Seems he landed on a weak branch.” 

 

Gabriel pushed himself out of the underbrush with a string of colorful expletives in several languages. What made Castiel stop short was the sight of Gabriel covered from head to wingtip in thick black mud. The corner of his mouth twitches as Castiel tried to fight smiling. Gabriel scowled up at him and slung a handful of mud in his direction. “What are you looking at?!”

 

At the sight of Gabriel’s indignant thrashing, Castiel burst out laughing long and hard until he was forced to land to hold onto his sides. 

 

Lucifer turned back and pulled up alongside his younger brother, grinning devilishly. “Oh, look at that,” he hummed. “Gabriel, how’d you end up in all of this mud?”

 

“Because Asshat.” he bent down and grabbed another handful of mud. Lobbing it at Lucifer. “This is a marshland forest.”

 

Lucifer easily ducked out of the way and smirked. “Really? I had no idea.” 

 

“Oh that’s it.” Gabriel stomps onto firmer ground and charges after Lucifer. “See how you like mud in your feathers.”

 

Lucifer laughed and took flight, grinning evilly. “Gotta catch me first, little bro!” he taunted. 

 

Gabriel flapped his wings sending mud flying in all directions, some of it landing on Castiel who’d finally calmed down to small hiccups. Unable to gain any altitude, Gabriel huffed and flopped down into the grass beside Castiel. “Can’t fly now.” he grumbled as he tried to wipe the dirt off of his primary feathers. 

 

Lucifer laughed and hovered above his brothers with a smug smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll groom you later,” he promised. 

 

“You better.” Gabriel grumped with arms crossed against his chest.

 

Lucifer laughed and landed next to Gabriel, holding out a penis shaped lollipop. “Here.” 

 

Gabriel eyed the candy with eyes narrowed into slits. Deciding that he could care less what shape candy was in, he grabbed it and shoved it into his mouth. Castiel’s eyes widened as he watched. “Lucifer, why would you give Gabriel a penis shaped confection?”

 

Lucifer grinned. “Reasons. And yes, Gabriel, it’s strawberry.” 

 

He pulled out the sucker and examined it closely, a sly grin forming. “Maybe we should give Dean a box of these. For practice.”

 

“Definitely,” Lucifer grinned. “I have two boxes of the cherry flavored ones.”

 

Castiel sat there quietly with his lips pressed tightly together as if he was trying to keep a secret inside.

 

Lucifer noticed and grinned. “Something funny over there, Castiel?”

 

He looked up in surprise and shook his dark-haired head emphatically. “Nothing of import.”

 

“If you say so, little bro.” 

 

Gabriel smirks at the younger angel and stuffs the lollipop into the pouch of his cheek. “I think it’s not something funny. I think he’s gagging to tell us something.” Looking at Lucifer, he nudges him. “Wonder what it is?”

 

“I bet it has to do with that Winchester boy,” Lucifer grinned, nudging his younger brother back. “Is that it, Cas?” 

 

Averting his gaze from either of the archangels, he becomes increasingly interested in the grass at his feet. “I..” sighing he hunched his shoulders as his wings shifted to hide him from view. “I kissed Dean. He didn’t react favorably.”

 

“Oh?” Lucifer questioned, rubbing his chin. “How  _ did  _ he react?”

 

“He..” sighing Castiel peeked over the top of his wing. “He returned the kiss at first. Then he pushed me away and fled. Perhaps I misread the situation to begin with.”

 

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “No, you didn’t misread the situation,” he sighed. “What happened is he let his heteronormativity get in the way. I’ll talk to him.” He smiled before giving a giant yawn. 

 

Gabriel chuckles. “That’ll go well. We’ll have to get a tow truck to pull that kid out of the closet and his head out of his ass.”

  
Castiel looks over at his brother’s forlornly. “I don’t wish to drag him anywhere.”

 

“It’ll be worth it,” Lucifer hummed, smirking. “Anyways, play time wore me out. Let’s get back to the bunker and in bed.” He quickly but easily began working through Gabriel’s mud soaked feathers.

 

“I propose converting one of our bedrooms into a proper nest.” Gabriel said with a sigh as his feathers were cleaned. “And when we feel the need we all just pile in like the old days.”

 

“I second this,” Lucifer said, smiling as he finished cleaning off his younger brother’s feathers. “Majorly.”

 

Castiel perks up a bit and folds his wings against his back. “It does get rather cold and lonely at night without hearing the host.”

 

Lucifer smiled and hugged his brothers close. “Especially cold.”

 

“Then let’s get back and freak out some humans with our nesting skills.” Gabriel wrapped his arms around Castiel and Lucifer, pulling them close. “Plus we should get out of here before one of the garrisons find us and try to put us to work.”

 

“Last one back to the bunker has to close the door!” Lucifer shouted, streaking down towards Earth and the bunker, laughing. 

 

Castiel gives Gabriel a playful shove before leaping up and racing after Lucifer. Gabriel squawked indignantly as he righted himself and chased Castiel. He hated to lose a race.

 

Lucifer laughed and flew back to the bunker and managed to get back to his room and burrowed underneath the covers without attracting the hunters. “I WIN”

 

“Cas will shut the door in a minute.” Gabriel says as he and the younger angel show up in Lucifer’s room. Unfortunately for Cas, Gabriel had him in bent over with his head wedged under Gabriel’s arm. “I technically landed us, so you’re last one in, Cas.”

 

Struggling against Gabriel’s grip for a few long moments, Castiel finally gives up. “Fine! If for no other reason than I wish to go to bed without further juvenile displays.”

 

Lucifer laughed and burrowed happily into the covers, making chirps as he did so. 

 

With a triumphant whoop, Gabriel released Castiel and jumped in beside Lucifer. Grabbing the covers he covered himself up to his neck. “Don’t forget the lights too. And no blowing them up. That’s cheating.”

 

Rolling his eyes, Castiel waved his hand to push the will of his grace around the bunker to secure it and turn out any remaining lights. Studying his brother’s positions, he decides the easiest place to enter the bed from was the middle. Crawling up from the foot, he insinuates himself between them and wiggled around until he was under the covers as they were.

  
Lucifer hummed and nestled himself next to Castiel and yawned. “Night, brothers. And thanks.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean finally gets his head out of his ass, and the angels start to make their nest.

The next morning Dean woke before Sam, which in itself was a rarity, but he had reason to be concerned. He wanted to check on Lucifer after having found him bleeding in the bathroom. Scrubbing the sleep from his eyes, he approached Lucifer’s room and opened the door quietly. What he found in front of him had him gaping in bewilderment. All three angels piled up like kittens with wings all akimbo. Dean didn’t know whether to quietly back away or take a picture for blackmail later. While he stood there in indecision, Sam walked passed the door, on his way back from his morning run. He nearly passed the door entirely until he saw Dean standing stationary with one foot over the threshold.    
  


“Dean, what are you doing?” he whispered, assuming that everyone else was still asleep. Startled by his brother’s sudden appearance, he visibly jumps until he sees who’s behind him. 

 

“Would you look at this?” Dean whispers harshly as he opens the door wider. Sam peeked around him and raised an eyebrow in amusement. 

 

“So? They’re sleeping. Big deal.” Sam replied as he stepped back out into the hallway. “It’s kinda cute.”

 

“Cute?! Grown men don’t puppy pile.” Dean obviously doesn’t care for the situation and isn’t afraid to show it. 

 

Sam just throws his bitch face at his brother for good measure. “But they’re not grown men, they’re angels. And maybe, you’d benefit from a nice cuddle pile if you didn’t have the hetero-stick still shoved up your ass where Dad left it.”

 

Lucifer chose this moment to wake up, yawning and flapping his wings as he untangled himself from his brothers, his hair bordering on Cas proportion bed head. He smiled lazily at the Winchesters. “Morning Sam, Dean.” He finished getting out of Castiel’s limpet hold and walked over to them. “We’ll be needing supplies later,” he told Dean before clasping Sam on the shoulder. “Oh, and Dean? You should really get that stick out of your ass. You hurt somebody’s feelings.” With that and a somewhat secretive smile, he made his way to the kitchen. 

 

Dean watches Lucifer leave with his mouth working like a fish while Sam chuckled. “Oh shut it, bitch.” Dean grumbled as he followed Lucifer, shutting the bedroom door quietly. “Luc’, wait up.” 

 

“Yes?” Lucifer hummed, turning and smiling at the elder Winchester.

 

Dean stopped short when he caught up and jabbed his thumb over his shoulder towards the bedroom. “Back there. What did you mean I hurt someone's feelings?” 

 

Lucifer sighed. “Castiel told me what happened,” he explained. “And he’s afraid that he misread the situation. He also had a very forlorn expression on his face.”

 

Dean sighs as he walks towards the kitchen. “I can’t handle that conversation without coffee and possibly whiskey.”

 

Lucifer rolled his eyes and followed Dean into the kitchen. “Yeah, well, sometimes feelings can’t wait for caffeine and whiskey,” he said. 

 

“What the hell was I supposed to do?” pouring a cup of coffee which he passed to the Archangel. “We were in the middle of a bar on a case.”

 

Lucifer took the coffee. “And you thought pushing him away and fleeing was a good idea?”

 

Dean poured himself a cup and plopped down in a chair at the table. “I panicked.” he sighed as he scooped some sugar into his mug. 

 

“How long ago was this?” Lucifer asked as he sat down across from Dean. 

 

Dean shrugged as he glanced at Lucifer. “About a week ago when we were in Oklahoma.”

 

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “The Wendigo case?” 

“Yea.” Dean said glumly before taking his first sip. “No son of mine.” he muttered to himself as he sits the mug down. 

 

Lucifer sighed. “Okay, Castiel’s timing was a bit. . . off. But I sense you haven’t tried to talk to him about this or anything.”

 

“And tell him what? ‘Sorry I had a gay panic because you kissed me in a redneck bar and all I could hear was Dad berating me in my head.’.” Dean shook his head. “It doesn’t sound any less lame outloud.”

 

Lucifer reached across the table and laid a gentle, comforting hand on Dean’s wrist. “Castiel will understand. He may not like it, but he will understand,” he said quietly. “And honestly, at this point, you don’t need words. I think you should kiss him.”

 

“I want to, Lucifer..” Dean looked up to meet the angel’s gaze. “But I haven’t kiss a guy since I was 13 and Dad caught me. I couldn’t walk right for a week after that. And now part of me expects him to pop out of some dark corner and do it again.”

 

“He won’t,” Lucifer soothed. “There’s only support here. John Winchester is not on this earth, in any form. And I’m appalled that a father would treat his son that way. And so you should do it. Just. . . Just do it. You can do it in private or in front of me and Sam and Gabe. We just want you to be happy and we know that’ll happen when you get together with Cas.”

 

“I appreciate that but..Cas..What if..” Dean looked lost as he considered the implications as he saw them. He finally pulled his hand from Lucifer’s and wrapped it around his mug. “What if I hurt him enough that he doesn’t want me?”

 

Lucifer tsked. “You haven’t hurt him that much. He’s more concerned that you don’t want him, that he did something wrong.” Cas appeared in the doorway with sleep rumpled hair and Lucifer flicked his eyes away to tell his youngest brother to stay back with a small smile. “I highly doubt that he’ll never want you, Dean. Just. . . Kiss him. Now, what do you want for breakfast? I was thinking omelettes.”

 

“Omelettes are fine, just go easy on the peppers.” Dean said without looking up from his coffee. “It’s not that I don’t want him. He’s my best friend and he’s got the best smile when he lets it out.” a bare hint of a smile formed as Dean thinks about it. “I think I love him, Lucifer and that’s terrifying in a way.”

 

Lucifer smiled and began getting the ingredients for his omelettes out of the fridge. “Finally you admit it, Dean Winchester. And yes, love is terrifying.” He smiled wistfully. “But that’s the way Father wanted it.”

 

“Yea, well he created Banana Spiders and the Platypus so what does he know.” Dean snorted as he finishes off his coffee.

 

“Banana spiders were actually Raphael’s idea and the platypus. . . That’s all Gabriel,” Lucifer laughed. He put the pan on the stove and began working. “I did snakes and Michael. . . Actually, not sure what Mikey did. Besides become Holier than Thou.” 

 

“I believe I was told he created Alligators.” Castiel said from his perch in the doorway of the kitchen. “Or it could have been the Eagle.”

 

Dean spun around in his chair, nearly falling out of it. “Cas?! How long you been standing there?”

 

“Long enough.” Castiel said cryptically as he walks into to get a cup of coffee. “And I believe you and I have much to discuss.”

 

Dean’s cheeks colored a rosy shade as he nodded his agreement but never taking his eyes off of Cas. 

 

Lucifer rolled his eyes at his brother and his. . . whatever the fuck Dean is as he began working on breakfast. “Gabe still asleep, Cas?” he asked.

 

“Yes. I tried to rouse him but he threatened to pluck my feathers and make a hat if I persisted.” He sat at the table as close to Dean as he could and smiled shyly at the hunter. “Although I believe it was a bluff.”

 

Lucifer laughed. “It is. He almost always makes that threat. What about Sam? Where’s he at?” 

 

“Hopefully showering.” Dean snorted as he got up for another cup of coffee. “No one will like him post run if he doesn’t.” 

 

Lucifer laughed. “Oh, I don’t know, there’s an odd sort of arousal that lingers inside someone at the sight of a strong, sweaty man,” he teased. He turned back to the stove and flipped the omelettes. “Dean, man breakfast, I’m gonna go wake up Gabriel,” he said. He made his way back to his room and smirked as he conjured a bucket of cold water. “Gabriel,” he sang. “Wake up!” 

 

“G’way” Gabriel grumbled from the bed as he pulled the covers over his head. “S’eepin’.”

 

“Breakfast is almost done, wake up,” Lucifer said, fingers poised to dump the bucket over his head. 

 

Gabriel raised his head with a squint at the light. His hair was sticking up at odd angles and looking thoroughly sleep rumpled. “Waffles?” He asked hopefully.

 

“Omelettes,” Lucifer corrected. “We had waffles three days in a row.” 

 

“Omelettes?! How do you expect me to eat eggs without waffles?” His eyes finally adjust and he eyes the bucket warily. “Um..Luci’, what are you doing with the bucket?”

 

“Persuasion. Get out of bed and you won’t get cold and wet.” He grinned. 

 

“You wouldn’t.” Gabriel huffs as he pulled the blanket tighter around himself. “It’d mess up our pre-nest.”

 

Lucifer smirked. “Do you really want to test that theory?” he asked. “Besides, I left Cas and Dean alone in the kitchen.” 

 

Groaning, Gabriel throws back the covers and gets out of the bed, his wings just as messy as his hair. “And that’s significant because?”

 

The grin that spread across the Morning Star’s face was reminiscent of a hyena. “Because  _ Dean  _ confessed to me that he thinks he’s in love with Cas while Cas was standing by the kitchen door,” he explained. 

 

“HE DIDN’T!” The Trickster said with barely contained glee.

 

“He  _ did, _ brother mine,” the Devil replied with excitement. “So, let’s go eavesdrop.”

 

Running his fingers through his hair, Gabriel rushed out of the room while tucking his wings away. “Where’s the Sasquatch?”

 

“Showering!” Lucifer called after him. 

 

Gabriel slowed down in the hall to let Lucifer catch up. “Come on...what if we miss the big out and proud declaration?” 

 

Lucifer ran quicker and caught up with Gabriel. “Let’s go!”

 

They race down the hallway and come to a skidding halt right outside the kitchen door. Gabriel presses his back to the wall and tilts his head to listen. 

 

Lucifer took the other side and did the same thing, winking at his brother. 

 

At first the voices inside are low as Castiel and Dean talk like they’d never done before. Castiel’s tone is firm but understanding as Dean confessed things to him that had never been uttered allowed to another person. Only two of which Lucifer had heard over coffee. Gabriel’s eyes widen at the story of John’s treatment of Dean when he was younger. “If that man were alive today…” the angel mutters as he glared across at his brother. 

 

“Oh, believe me, Picasso with a Razor would have  _ nothing  _ on me if I had the opportunity to get my hands on him,” Lucifer growled. 

 

And then they both hear Dean hesitate. “Cas, I...I care for you, alot. And I think..” Dean stopped to take a deep breath before continuing. “I think I love you. In more than a friend kinda way and I’m sorry for Oklahoma. It was rude and I hope that you could forgive me.”

 

“Strong start..” Gabriel whispered 

 

“Very strong,” Lucifer agreed very quietly. “Now, Dean, do what I told you, and you’ll be solid, okay? Go for it.” 

 

The Archangel missed Castiel’s response to Dean’s apology, but they couldn’t miss the surprised squeak he let out when Dean leaned forward and pulled the Seraph into a proper kiss.  For the next several minutes the only sounds coming from the kitchen are breathy sighs and maybe a happy chuckle from Dean. 

 

Gabriel pumped his fist into the air as he mouthed a triumphant “Yes!”

 

Lucifer grinned and tilted his head back up to the hall, making a motion to help make it seem like they weren’t eavesdropping. 

 

Walking quickly back down the hall, Gabriel turned to Lucifer with a grin. “Finally, he pulled his head out of his ass. I thought we’d have to do surgery.”

 

“You and me both,” Lucifer laughed. “Now, let’s just pretend I got you up.” He swiftly hauled his younger brother over his shoulder and whistled idly as he walked back down the hall. 

 

Letting out a shout of indignation, Gabriel cursed the entire way to the kitchen. “Dammit, MorningStar..I’m not a fledgling. PUT ME DOWN!”

 

“You were certainly acting like one in the pre-nest, Messenger!” Lucifer cackled before stopping in the kitchen. “Oh. . . Sorry, Dean, Cas, I’ll umm. . . give you two some privacy,” he said hesitantly, seeing that they were still lip locked. “Just um. . . No sex in the kitchen, please?” 

 

Dean pulled away from Castiel who had seated himself in the hunter’s lap. Clearing his throat he tried to move to get up from his seat but a withering look from Castiel kept him right where he was. “We were not about to fornicate, Lucifer.” Castiel stated from his spot, where he seemed quite content to stay. 

 

“Yea, that’s just not sanitary.” Dean added as he took a bite of his previously forgotten breakfast. 

 

“Darn. I was hoping to make a comeback in the porn industry from the videos of you two.” Gabriel quipped from Lucifer’s shoulder as he tried to twist around to catch a sight of the pair.

 

Lucifer laughed and set his brother down. “Gabriel, no. I don’t need my brothers to be in porn.”

 

“And I know I’m adorable but I don’t want the world to see my birthday suit.” Dean grinned. 

 

Castiel however was not amused at the prospect. Glaring at Gabriel his arm tightened around Dean’s shoulder. “Nor would I want him to.”

 

“Want who to do what?” Sam asked as he came into the kitchen with hair still damp from his shower. He stopped short at the scene before him. “What’s going on?”

 

“Oh, Dean finally got his head out of his ass and confessed his feelings for Castiel, if the positioning is correct,” Lucifer explained. 

 

Dean smiled shyly to himself but avoided looking at Sam while Castiel looked like the cat who got the cream. 

 

“Really?!” Sam asked. He was truly surprised that Dean had actually gone through with it. The whole thing about Dean being into guys was still new to Sam and he had to admit that it would take some adjusting on his part to get used to the idea, but ultimately he was happy that Dean was finally doing something for himself. Something that could make him happy. So Sam would try his best to be as supportive as possible. “That’s great.” Sam said with a genuine smile. 

 

Lucifer grinned. “Now, breakfast,” he hummed happily, his mind already plotting things for his other brother as he finished making the omelettes. “Coffee’s all made, by the way.” 

 

Sam padded over to the coffee and poured himself a cup. “So what are the plans today. Find a hunt?” 

 

“Not until after breakfast, Moose.” Gabriel replied as he pours a cup and adds an obscene amount of sugar and cream. “I was promised waffles.”

 

“ _ I  _ promised no such thing.” Lucifer laughed. “An angel cannot survive on waffles alone.” 

 

“You’re right. You need waffles AND orgasms.” Gabriel smirked at Lucifer and hopped up onto the counter. He found a perverse joy in teasing his older brother and took every opportunity to do so.

 

Lucifer flushed and brandished the spatula at his brother. “I can summon that bucket of water here at any moment, Gabriel,” he said. 

 

“Fine!” Gabriel sulked into his coffee. “I’ll eat an omelette. But don’t think I won’t get you back for the bucket.”

 

Dean groans as he thumps his forehead against Castiel’s shoulder. “Please, no angelic prank wars IN the bunker or involving the Bunker. It didn’t end well last time.”

 

Sam and Gabriel chuckle at the memory of their attempt to try and teach Castiel the finer arts of pranking, which ended up with Dean’s room filled with soap bubbles and several of the tomes filled with pornography of all types. Some of them Sam was sure would never be able to forget. Not with all the brain bleach in the world.

 

“I believe I have improved.” Castiel said hopefully as he took Dean’s empty plate to the sink. 

 

“You have,” Lucifer said. “But no, no more pranks. Especially when we have our nest to consider.” He gave his brothers pointed looks as he served everybody’s omelettes and made himself a cup of coffee. “We’re creating it in my room, yes?”

 

“Nest?” The Winchesters asked simultaneously, twin looks of confusion on their faces. 

 

“Yes, that’s what we were doing when you woke us up,” Lucifer hummed. “Or, more accurately, me. We’re going to turn my room into a nest. We shared a nest in Heaven, and since its. . . difficult for me to return to Heaven at will, we decided we’ll nest down here.” 

 

“I’m going to assume that you’re not talking the twigs and stray bits kind.” Dean looked skeptical at the three Angels while Sam just seemed intrigued by the idea. 

 

“Nope! That’s not comfortable. Warm, soft things. Things that remind us of each other,” Lucifer beamed. 

 

“Like the duvet from my bed.” Gabriel added helpfully. 

 

“Or our feathers left over from molting.” Castiel chimed in. 

 

“My band tees, things like that,” Lucifer hummed happily. “Very cozy, very happy.” He was practically jumping up and down in excitement, a warm glow on his face as he hyped himself about nesting for the first time in millennia.

 

Dean smirked as he looked at each of the angels. “Sounds like a frat house before the yearly cleaning.”

 

Sam rolled his eyes. “What would you know about a frat house?”

 

“About as much as you, Sam. You’ve got to actually party to know what’s going on.” Dean made his way out the doorway. “But whatever makes you guys happy. Knock yourselves out. I just won’t be in your puppy pile anytime soon.”

 

Lucifer laughed happily and beamed. “I’d make a wager on that, but considering that I just won money, I won’t,” he grinned, looking over at Gabriel. “Pay up, short stack.”

 

Groaning, Gabriel pulled a stack of bills folded in half out of his pocket. Peeling off three hundred dollars worth of bills, he slapped it into Lucifer’s hand. “Remember kids. Never make bets with the Devil.” He said to the room in general. 

 

“A bet about what?” Sam asked as he watched the transaction take place. 

 

“Who would confess what first,” Lucifer explained, humming softly as he polished his nails on his shirt and took the money. “I always win, Gabriel.”

 

Sam snorted in laughter as Castiel’s eyes narrowed at his brothers. “You made a wager about Dean and myself?”

 

Lucifer grinned. “That’s what older brothers do,” he said warmly. 

 

Huffing, Castiel turns on his heels and follows the same path Dean had taken, leaving the two Archangels and Sam to cleanup breakfast. 

 

“I think you pissed him off.” Sam mused as he started to clean up.  

 

Lucifer shrugged as he worked along Sam’s side. “Oh well, he’ll get over it.”

 

“It wouldn’t be the first time Cassie has been miffed at us and it probably won’t be the last.” Gabriel chirped from his seat. “What I don’t get is why you two are doing dishes like an old married couple. We’re angels, not busboys. Snap that stuff clean and let’s get to building that nest.”

 

Lucifer flicked the water from the dishes at Gabriel, pinking as he did so. “Shut up.” 

 

“Yea, Gabriel. Zip it.” Sam swatted the dampened towel out at him. “It’s called active rest. You should try it sometime.”

 

“Active rest? That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard but if it keeps you two happy, then who am I to argue.” Gabriel setting his dirty dish next to Lucifer with a grin. “I’m going back to bed and finish what I was doing before I was rudely interrupted.”

 

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “Seriously? Gabriel? No, you’re going to go get the things we need for the nest, now  _ scram. _ ” He reached over and smacked the top of his brother’s head with a soapy hand. “Now.”

 

Although it didn’t truly hurt, Gabriel still flinched away from the strike before stomping towards the door like a petulant child. “Fine, but only because I was going to anyway and not because you told me to.”

 

Lucifer laughed and continued washing the dishes. “You’re such a child,” he teased, snapping his fingers and putting a pacifier in Gabriel’s mouth. 

 

With an undignified yelp around the pacifier, he ripped it out of his mouth, throwing it at Lucifer’s head before flying away. But what Gabriel didn’t realize as he made speed from the scene was that his aim wasn’t that true and that Sam had moved to get another towel. So instead of the pacifier hitting its intended target, it bounced wetly off of Sam’s cheek instead. Sam jerked away from the rubbery missile and ended up stumbling into Lucifer. 

 

Lucifer caught Sam and rolled his eyes, snapping the offending thing away. “You okay?” he asked. 

 

Sam turned a bright shade of pink as he stood on his own feet again. “Fine. Just wasn’t expecting that is all. I’m usually not so..clumsy.” He grabbed a dry towel and started rubbing one of the washed mugs furiously to try and forget the embarrassment. 

 

Lucifer blushed lightly as well. “Well, getting hit with a wet pacifier would make anyone clumsy,” he said, turning back to washing the dishes. 

 

“So...a nest, huh?” Sam tried to divert the subject since he was more than ready to forget the gangly teenager moment, which he firmly believed a man in his middle thirties shouldn’t be having. 

 

“Yes,” Lucifer’s voice turned warm and happy. “Very much a nest.” He smiled warmly and almost glowed with happiness. “Nesting is very important to an angel’s health and well-being. The longer we go without nesting, the more damage it does to our psyche.” 

 

Sam thought about that for a while, letting it turn over in his mind. Finally he’s struck with an analogy that makes his heart a little heavier and makes him wonder about the direction of his own life had taken over the years. “Kinda like if you don’t have someplace to call home for a prolonged period?”

 

Lucifer hesitated and nodded. “Yeah, like that, very much like that.” he admitted. “Last time I nested was before my Fall. It was with Gabriel, Castiel, and Michael.” He sighed. 

 

“That sounds..really nice.” Sam slowly picked up one of the plates and dried it without taking his eyes from it. 

 

“It is,” Lucifer hummed happily. “Many happy times are in the nest, to be honest. It’s where fledglings are born, memories are made. You’re safe and comforted.” 

 

Taking deep breath to try and pull him himself out of the funk he was plunging into, he clapped Lucifer on the shoulder in a genuinely friendly gesture. “I’m glad you’ll get to experience that again. I hope it helps make the adjustment to life down here easier for you.”

 

Lucifer smiled and returned the clap. “I hope so too,” he said. “And I think it will. Can you finish up here? I need to check on my brothers.” 

 

“Sure.” Sam said with a tone of cheer in his voice that not longer matched inside. “Let me know if you need any materials for your project.”

 

Lucifer smiled warmly and happily. “Will do,” he promised. He then skipped off happily, singing “Stairway to Heaven” as he did so. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The angels finished the nest and integrate the Winchesters into the nest.

Lucifer danced around the bunker, singing excitedly. After a few days of hard work and much talk amongst his brothers, he was getting his nest back. It wouldn’t be the same without Michael, but Lucifer was okay with that. 

 

He had a home again, a nest. His family. He was home. It wasn’t the same as Heaven, but Lucifer didn’t mind. 

 

“Gabe! Cas!” he shouted as he searched for his brothers excitedly. It was done! Completed! Wholly and truly theirs!

 

Gabriel and Castiel were seated in what was now termed ‘the living room’, which was no more than a sofa and a huge television taking up a section of the entryway of the bunker near the telescope. Both of them seemed engrossed in a game system that had been snapped up by the Trickster. “Cas, you can’t just go throwing sticky grenades everywhere. I thought you were a better soldier than that?”

 

“It is a perfectly legitimate strategy in such a confined space. You just keep getting in the way of the trajectory.” Castiel argued from his spot as he repeatedly pressed buttons on his controller. 

 

Lucifer burst into the living room and hugged his brothers happily, effectively ruining the game. “IT’S DONE!!” 

 

“What is?” Gabriel said distractedly before shooting Castiel a glare when his character died to the gleeful sounds of cheering and confetti. 

 

“I’d venture to say he’s talking about the nest. You know the one we’ve been working on until you decided I needed to learn to play Halo on The Box.” Castiel sat down his controller when the screen went black from the round ending. “I’m still confused as to why a game is called Halo when there are no angels.”

 

Lucifer laughed and hugged his brothers tight to him. “Yes, Cas is right,  _ our nest is done _ ,” he laughed warmly, hot tears of happiness prickling his eyes. “I’m home,” he whispered. 

 

“Not quite.” Gabriel said as he patted Lucifer’s hand. “One more thing needs to be added.”

 

Lucifer looked at his brother. “Us?” 

 

“Us.” Gabriel affirmed as he stood and ran down stairs to the hallway. “Last one in cleans the bathrooms.”

 

Lucifer squawked and ran after his brother with Castiel hot on his tail. “No, no, no, Hell tortured angel gets into the nest first!” 

 

“Not if you don’t beat him there, Lucifer. You know Gabriel.” Castiel grinned, for once not minding that more than likely he’d be last and made to clean. 

 

Lucifer grinned and hugged his brother before heading off after Gabriel, racing past him and diving into the nest.

 

“Hey!” Gabriel shouted as Lucifer made it into the nest first. Opening his wings, he leaped across the room after his brother, landing on the mattresses beneath the nest. Each of the box springs moaning in protest. 

 

Lucifer laughed and grabbed his brother and cuddled him close, making happy sounds as he did so. His wings flared out and he wrapped them around Gabriel protectively, burrowing both of them into the nest.  

 

Castiel wandered in several minutes later and stopped in the doorway to take in the changes to the room. What had started as a simple collection of soft things for the bed had turned into a full redecorating project once Lucifer and Gabriel had really gotten into it. And now with the main lamps turned off he could see the fairy lights hung around the room casting soft light and giving the illusion of a starry sky. While the bed was covered in quilts, comforters and throw pillows of every size, color and shape. But what really caught Castiel’s eye was the mobile hanging above the bed. It resembled a dream catcher but the patterns of the woven threads were far more intricate and each of their feathers had been included in the design. Castiel stared at it hanging above the bed and for a reason he could not explain, felt his heart tighten with emotion. 

 

Lucifer poked his head out and beamed at his baby brother. “Come on in.” he said, holding his hand out for his brother.

 

Swallowing thickly, Castiel sheds his jacket and crawls into the nest between Gabriel and Lucifer. Turning onto his back he stares up at the mobile. “I think I remember something Naomi tried to erase but I’m not sure.”

 

Lucifer snuggled into Castiel. “What?” he hummed. 

 

Gabriel crooked his wing to half cover Castiel as he curled into his side. Castiel took a deep breath and nodded towards the mobile. “It’s more a feeling like I’ve seen that before.”

 

“That’s because you have.” Gabriel mumbled from Castiel’s shoulder.

 

Lucifer nodded. “I made it. Long time ago.” he said happily. “It used to have Michael’s feathers but he’s no longer a part of our nest. And he didn’t contribute much to it. It took Gabriel’s help to remake it.” He beamed happily. 

 

Castiel smiled warmly as he turned onto his side to face Lucifer. “Then we are home?”

 

Lucifer nodded and beamed. “We’re home,” he confirmed. “Now, to just get the Winchesters to nest with us. That’d be perfect.” 

Gabriel snorted from under his wing. “Fat luck with that one, Luci. Look how long it took Dean to nut up and admit he wanted Cas.”

 

“It did take him quite a while.” Castiel admitted with a shrug. “I don’t see him being as we are without a great deal of fuss.”

 

“One,” Lucifer raised an important looking finger and brandished it at his younger brothers, “we get Sam in first. Two, I’ve been perfecting the ‘puppy dog look’ that Sam has mastered. Three, since Castiel has his nest here, it won’t be long before Dean joins.” He stretched out languidly, wings fluttering happily. 

 

Weeks go by and the angels spend their nights in the nest, except for Castiel who is absent from time to time to be with Dean. During that time Sam can hear their laughter drifting down the hallway and it makes him curious as to what goes on in the nest or what it even looks like. Cradling his wrapped arm after a returning from a hunt that went as smoothly as a Harpy hunt can go, Sam stopped outside Lucifer’s room and peeked into the open door. His eyebrows rose high onto his forehead at the sight of the lights, feathers and pillows strewn around the room. He was amused that it actually did look like a nest if you closed your left eye and tilted your head. But above all it looked comfortable and seemed peaceful. 

 

Lucifer rolled over in the nest and looked at Sam staring. “Do you like it?” he asked proudly. He frowned at the arm draped across Sam’s chest. “You okay?” 

 

Startled, Sam visibly jumps when Lucifer speaks. Recovering quickly, he shakes his head. “Sorry...I didn’t see you in there.” he looked down at his arm and shrugged. “I’m fine. Just a Harpy getting a little too handsy with me and the cut’s a bit infected. Nothing a soak in epsom salt won’t take care of.”

 

Lucifer rolled out of the nest and walked over to Sam. Touching the arm, he healed it with minimal use of his Grace. “There. You might want to still take that soak but it’s healed now.” He smiled warmly up at him, pinking a little. 

 

“Thanks.” Sam said with a wiggle of his fingers as he flexed his wrist. He took a moment to marvel that the touch of Lucifer’s grace didn’t feel ice cold like he remembered but more like a refreshing cool drink of water on a hot summer day and a part of him found that fact comforting in a way. Looking around the room once again, he nodded. “I like it. Seems like it’d be comfy. Especially on cold nights.”

 

“It’s very comfy,” Lucifer confirmed. He looked over at the nest and then back at Sam. “Would you like to come in?” he asked a bit shyly. 

 

Sam looked torn between accept the offer and diving into the pile of blankets and leaving. “I don’t want to intrude.” he finally said taking a half step back. 

 

“Nonsense! I’m inviting you!” Lucifer said, grabbing the hand that he didn’t heal impulsively and tugging him closer. “Please?” he asked, his eyes going soft and round, lower lip jutting out just slightly. 

 

Sam’s eyes darted between the bed and Lucifer with a rejection to the invitation on his lips, but at the sight of the pout on Lucifer’s face his resolve melted like butter in a hot pan. “O..okay.” Sam entered the room completely and moved to stand at the foot of the nest. “I like the lights.”

 

Lucifer beamed and tugged Sam down onto the nest like an overexcited puppy, beaming happily. 

 

Sam struggled to keep upright but ended up falling over in an ungraceful heap. “Lucifer, I still stink like harpies.” 

 

“Oh well,” Lucifer purred warmly. “We don’t mind.” 

 

“God this is comfy.” he nearly groaned as his muscles start to relax into the mattress. “Haven’t slept in a bed like this in...never. I’ve never slept in a bed like this.”

 

“It’s not just a bed, that’s why,” he squeaked happily. “It’s a  _ nest. _ ”

 

Sam stretched from fingertips to stocking feet. Settling back into the nest with a tired smile. “Need to make one of my own then. Might actually get some sleep for a change.”

 

“You can just nest with us,” Lucifer offered, curling up on his side and facing Sam. “You’re pretty much family to us so you can just be here.” 

 

Sam chuckled as he lifted his head and looked at the nest. “I don’t think I’d really fit with the three of you. I’m kind of a cover hog.”

 

Lucifer laughed merrily. “So am I, to be honest. But that’s what wings are for.”

 

“I’ll take you’re word for it.” Sam says as he rolled onto his side, tucking a pillow firmly under his cheek as his eyes grew heavy. “So damned tired.” he muttered to himself more than to Lucifer.

 

“Then sleep,” Lucifer murmured, hesitantly tucking himself around Sam, burying his face in Sam’s back.

 

At first, Sam stiffened at the feel of Lucifer being so close that he could smell the soap he’d used that morning, but soon relaxed when he realized that he was safe and that this wasn’t the same Lucifer from years ago. “Promise me something, Lucifer?”

 

“What, Sam?” Lucifer asked softly. 

 

“Don’t..” Sam lets out a sigh and rolls over to face the former fallen angel. “Don’t let me dream.”

 

Lucifer gently stroked Sam’s face, giving a soft, understanding smile. “Of course, Sam.”

 

Closing his eyes tight as if to fight the images, he gripped the pillow tight. “I can still see the flames. Smell it..Every night.”

 

“Do you want me to purge them from you mind?” he asked quietly.

 

Sam opened his eyes and slowly shook his head. “Not completely. It’s a part of me now but I wouldn’t say no if you could take the edge off.”

 

“That I can do,” Lucifer whispered. He pressed two fingers to Sam’s forehead and concentrated, taking the edge off of Sam’s nightmare.

 

Sam let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. Nearly a decade of tension seemed to melt out of him. “Thank you.” he said sleepily as his eyes stay shut and he slips into the deepest slumber he’d ever remember having.

 

Lucifer smiled and stayed awake keeping Sam within the confines of his arms as the taller human slept, keeping an eye out for dreams.

The next night as all the angels lay in the nest talking softly in enochian as they groomed each others wings, Sam stumbled into the room rubbing his eye like a sleepy child. “Hey guys. Um...is that ...is the a…” he searched for the right words that wouldn’t make him sound weak when all he wanted was to feel safe again from his nightmares. 

 

Lucifer understood instantly and he gently pried his wings from Castiel’s gentle and reverent hands before coming over to Sam and tugging him close. “Open invitation.” he whispered quietly. “Whenever you need it, for whatever reason. Okay?” he gave a soft, almost shy smile. 

 

Nodding, Sam looked towards Castiel and Gabriel who sat quietly watching him. Gabriel was the first to crack a smile and open wings and arms. “Come on, Moose. I’ll braid your hair while Luci’ finishes my wings.”

 

“Not no, but hell now. I don’t need Dean to find that bit of information out. I wouldn’t live it down.” Sam says with a small grin as he left Lucifer’s grasp and crawled into the nest. 

 

Castiel nods and motions for Lucifer to rejoin them. “I believe Gabriel has said what happens in the nest stays in the nest.”

 

Lucifer beamed and rejoined his family, crawling back into the nest and starting to groom Gabriel’s wings again. “That he has,” he agreed. 

 

Once grooming was finished and everyone’s hair and wings were set to rights, they all nestled down into the nest, putting Sam and Castiel in the middle. Lucifer stretched his wings out and wrapped them around his brothers and Sam, purring contently as he sank to the nest. 

 

Weeks went by and Sam soon found himself sleeping in the nest most nights and when he didn’t the nightmares he’d been having were more manageable. In fact his entire demeanor seemed lighter the more time he spent with the angels. He’d gone so far as to start bringing games to the room for them to play and each one had been a lot of fun, except Monopoly. Monopoly was a disaster that ended up with Castiel owning everything and the archangels literally wrestling over the last hotel piece. That was the first night that Dean saw them all together. At first Dean just rolled his eyes at their antics and declined any invitation into the nest. His main reasoning is that Dean Winchester didn’t cuddle, to which Castiel audibly snorted in amusement. 

 

Lucifer finally approached Dean one night. “Hey, we’re playing strip poker in the nest,” he said casually. “You in?”

 

“You’re playing strip poker? With your brothers and mine?” Dean looked up from his book and asked disbelieving with a raised eyebrow. “Didn’t know nesting time was naked time for you guys.”

 

“Just a game,” Lucifer said with a shrug. “And sometimes being naked in the nest is even better for you. All the skin on skin contact is very healthy. It’s actually incredibly platonic.”

 

“If you say so.” Dean said as he went back to his book. “No thanks on naked time. Only one angel I care to be naked with and not in a group setting.”

 

Lucifer laughed gaily as he clapped Dean on the shoulder. “Suit yourself,” he said. He then made his way back to the nest to get the game going. 

 

The next time Dean saw the “gay nest times” as he’s come to call it was when Lucifer slid out, Gabriel hot on his heels, the smaller archangel seemingly determined to tackle his older brother. 

 

“LUCIFER YOU CAN’T CHEAT IN A  _ PILLOW FIGHT _ !” he screeched. 

 

Lucifer began running backwards, blowing a very mature raspberry at his brother. “YOU CAN’T CATCH ME, SHORT STUFF!”

 

Dean stopped just outside the door and looked inside to find Castiel covered in downy pink feathers as he lazily spun a pillow in the air. “Defend yourself, Samuel.” 

 

Sam stood on the opposite side of the nest with two pillows in hand. “Bring it on, Castiel.” 

 

With twin war cries they began mercilessly wailing on each other with the pillows until Cas gets knocked off the bed and slid across the floor, coming to rest at Dean’s feet. Looking up with a type of smile Dean hadn’t seen on the angel before. It was positively gleeful. “Hello Dean. Are you here to defend my honor?”

 

“Babe, at this point I’m not sure an entire garrison could.” Dean says barely holding in his laughter as he walked away. 

 

One night, Dean’s complaints could be heard drifting down the hall. “Come on, Cas. I don’t see why it’s necessary. I sleep just fine by myself.”

 

“Because Dean, it promotes bonding with your sibling and adopted siblings.” Castiel patiently explained with a tone that sounded like it was the thousandth time he’d said it.

 

Lucifer groaned and snuggled closer to Gabriel and Sam, burying his nose in Sam’s hair as his wings stroked Gabriel’s back. “Can Cas just like...pick Dean up and carry him in here and just  _ dump  _ him in?” he mumbled.  

 

“Give it time and he just might.” Sam said with a chuckle as he gently pet the arch of Lucifer’s wing. “Dean may be tough on the outside but he’s not wearing the pants in that duo, if you catch my drift.”

 

Gabriel made a gagging noise into his pillow. “I don’t want to hear about your brother bottoming. I don’t even want to know about him topping.”

Sam screws up his face in disgust and poked Gabriel in the side. “Not what I meant and you know it, you candy pirate.”

 

Lucifer snorted. “I fully caught Sam’s drift, and made it  _ appropriate _ , you perv.” He snuggled a bit closer to Sam and Gabriel, shivering as Sam pet the inside of his wing. “Besides, Gabe, we all know you don’t care about whether or not you’re top or bottom, just as long as it’s sex.” 

 

“Male, female, Top or bottom. My pan heart cares not.” Gabriel agreed with a sagely nod. 

 

“That explains so much about you.” Sam said wistfully with a grin tilting at the corner of his mouth. 

 

Gabriel was about to reply when they hear a door slam and the sound of Dean grumbling followed by Castiel saying in a low, serious tone. “Dean Winchester, If you wish to see anything of mine in private ever again, you are getting into this nest and show us some respect!”

 

Lucifer snickered into Sam’s hair and closed his eyes. “Maybe now he’ll start understanding. Go Castiel for using the low blow.” 

 

Gabriel giggled. “If it wouldn’t undermine Cas’ efforts I’d say we greet the Righteous Man in our birthday suits.”

 

“I can tell you right now that that won’t work,” Lucifer chuckled. “We’ll talk to Castiel if we want private time in the future, Gabe.”

 

“When did you stop being fun?” Gabriel huffed. 

 

“About the time you got marshmallow fluff in his wings.” Sam said quietly as the door opened to reveal a smirking Castiel and a moping Dean. “Hi Dean, gonna join our slumber party?”

 

Dean glances at Castiel and sighs. “Yes, please.”

 

Lucifer grinned. “Get in, losers, we’re gonna snuggle,” he said very seriously, tugging his Vessel and the other archangel closer to him. “Get in, Dean.”

Dean crawled in behind Gabriel and laid stiffly on his back. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.” he mumbled to himself. 

 

Gabriel being the trickster that he is, rolled over and curls up as close as possible to Dean. “Believe it, Buttercup.”

 

“Well keep your inappropriate morning wood away from me.” Dean shimmied a few inches away. 

 

“Oh for the love of Christ on a pogo stick.” Sam sighed as he crawled over Gabriel and pushed him towards Lucifer. “Go cuddle, Luci.” Sam laid down next to his brother and pulled him closer to the middle with him and Gabriel while Castiel took his position behind the older Winchester. “Now, stop bitching. This is no worse than when we were kids.”

 

Lucifer chuckled at Sam’s talking, wrapping his arms around Gabriel while unfurling his wings a bit more, covering them all. “Now, no more bitching, everyone just relax, cuddle and go to sleep.”

 

Castiel opens his wing and lays it over Lucifer’s, creating a full blanket of feathers for all of them. Dean turns over and curls up against Castiel. After a few minutes he finds the position uncomfortable and rolled to his other side, coming nose to nose with Sam who gave him a smile. “Hey.” Snorting in amusement, Dean closed his eyes and muttered “Night, Sammy.”

 

Lucifer nestled his head down into Gabriel’s shoulder, falling into a deep sleep. 

 

From then on, it was easier to integrate Dean into the nest, especially once he relaxed and allowed himself to enjoy the nighttime snuggles.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer wakes up one night and thanks his Father for this second chance

One night, Lucifer woke up in the middle of it, and he spent a couple of minutes staring at his family. Sam and Gabriel were curled up around each other, Gabriel’s back into Lucifer’s chest. Dean and Cas were spooning, the angel being the big spoon for his hunter, black feathers underneath Lucifer’s. Shaking out his wings gently, he slid out and went over to the window that they had created. Outside, the snow fell onto Lebanon, Kansas and he watched it fall for a bit, his wings around his body for additional warmth. 

He could feel his Grace warming up with each day, with each happy memory, with each night cuddled up with his family, and he raised his eyes from the window sill to the sky, smiling as he silently thanked his Father for allowing him to redeem himself and find the love of a family once again. 

 

Lucifer’s thoughts were interrupted by the feel of Sam’s warm body wrapping around him in a sleepy hug. “Lucifer, what are you doing up? Come back to bed.” he whispered with his chin resting on Lucifer’s shoulder. Looking back at the bed, Lucifer sees Gabriel’s bright eyes watching him with his hand outstretched. 

 

Lucifer smiled and he turned his head slightly to peck Sam’s cheek. “Yes, Sam.” he murmured, heading back to the nest and sliding underneath the covers, wrapping his wings around them again. Dean and Cas slept undisturbed and Lucifer smiled as Sam and Gabriel got as close to him as they could. He kissed Gabriel’s forehead and the top of Sam’s head before smiling and closing his eyes once more. 

 

Lucifer fell back asleep feeling loved and at peace with himself. But more than that, he fell back asleep feeling blessed. 

**Author's Note:**

> Find us on tumblr at lucibae-is-dancing-in-hell (Mrs_SimonTam_PHD) or mindyleeb (mindylee)
> 
> Comments and Kudos are Shiny!!


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